Robbery with Ray

The following story illustrates how one’s upbringing affects how one reacts to the different circumstances life may throw at you. Listen up . . .

Back when I was at Ohio State I was sharing an apartment with a guy named Ray. Ray was born and raised in a poor, tough neighborhood on the outskirts of Wheeling, WV. Trust me, I spent a couple weekends there and it was, shall we say, not the best place to raise a family. This fact will be relevant to my story shortly.

Anyway, Ray and I had become pretty good friends and had agreed to rent an apartment together out near Reynoldsburg. One night after we’d been out partying with friends, we returned home around 3:00am to find our door ajar. Upon walking in, it was apparent we’d been robbed. The TV and stereo were gone, and stuff was strewn everywhere. The apartment had been ransacked.

Being the naïve bonehead that I was, I immediately began storming about the apartment, waving my arms and raging at the injustice bestowed upon me. Hell, I’d never been burgled before.

Ray? Not so much. He had other thoughts.

As I turned around, I saw that my friend had grabbed a butcher knife from the kitchen drawer and was moving stealthily down the hallway, opening doors and closets, looking for the thief, or thieves, that might still be there, hiding.

I swear he looked like a freaking ninja, ready to pounce.

So, as yours truly had lost his gourd and was barreling around the house like a madman screaming at life’s injustices, Ray was a step ahead, hoping to exact some sweet revenge on a crook that had picked the wrong apartment to burgle.

You see, Ray had been there before.

Turns out that the apartment was empty, but I learned a valuable lesson that night – before you react like a moron, stop and consider the possibilities.

And always think a step ahead, kids. Always think a step ahead.