Archive for November, 2017

(DailyStar) — Sahar Tabar has undergone extreme plastic surgery in a bid to look like Angelina Jolie. The Iranian teenager is only 19, but has reportedly had 50 operations in a bid for fuller lips and defined cheek bones, according to Belgian website Sud Info. Sahar claims to be one of the actress’ biggest fans and says she “would do anything” to emulate the movie star.

Sahar Tabar would do anything? Really? That’s a shocking statement. Who would’ve thought it? Those photos give no indication of that at all. Anyway, had I not read the article I’d have thought that was Angelina Jolie. Dead ringer really, with the emphasis on the word “dead”. Just stellar work by the plastic surgeon.

Note to self: Never get plastic surgery in Iran.

Source – Bacteria discovered on the surface of the International Space Station may not be from Earth, a Russian cosmonaut claims. Anton Shkaplerov, an ISS expedition flight engineer who will take his third trip to the space station in December, said that living bacteria harvested from the metal skin may be extraterrestrial. Shkaplerov said: “Bacteria that had not been there during the launch of the ISS module were found on the swabs.
“So they have flew from somewhere in space and settled on the outside hull.” Incredibly, bacteria found on the ISS can survive in a vacuum and temperatures ranging from -150C to 150C. Last month Sky reported that bacterial cells treated with a common antibiotic were spotted changing shape to survive while aboard the ISS.

Isn’t this how every space horror movie since 1953 has started? A seemingly harmless bacteria finds its way inside your spaceship and proceeds to grow into a freakin’ 12-foot space monster from hell and then kill everybody on board?

Honestly, if this doesn’t scare the bejesus out of you I don’t know what will. First off, there is no way we can let this craft back into the earth’s atmosphere. NO WAY MAN. Why? Because SOMETHING FLEW IN FROM SPACE AND SETTLED ON THE SHIP’S HULL. And oh, by the way, it can live in a damn vacuum and in temperatures ranging from -150C to 150C and is changing shape to survive. 

Sweet dear God we must blow that Space Station to hell and we must blow it to hell right now. Come on Trump! Do something!

Note: This reminds me of that damn Tardigrade I wrote about once. Scary stuff.

Also called a Water Bear. Cool.

First, watch the video:

Wait. What just happened? That’s physically impossible. Dude floated back up like a damn ghost or something. That’s some supernatural shit right there, man. And the player from the Chiefs knew. Look at how he looked at Zay Jones. He was flabbergasted. Here’s what happened – Zay Jones forgot he was pretending to be human and acted exactly how an alien from God-knows-where would act. Hey, I wrote about these people recently. I ain’t dumb.

I recently read an article in Nat Geo entitled Inside the Hidden World of Jaguars that was absolutely fascinating. I highly recommend it. Anyway, here are some of the facts contained within. Good stuff.

  • The Jaguar is the largest cat in the Americas, and the 3rd largest in the world behind lions and tigers.
  • The name jaguar comes from the Native American word yaguar, which means “he who kills with one leap.” Awesome.
  • Jaguars can live to be 12 to 15 years old in the wild.
  • Jaguars can grow to nearly 8-feet in length.
  • Jaguars are at home in rivers, on jungle ground, and in trees. They love to swim.
  • Jaguars eyes have night-vision retinas. That’s badass.
  • Jaguars have the most powerful bite, relative to their size, among the big cats.
  • Uniquely among the big cats, Jaguars bite the skulls rather than the throats of their prey, piercing the brain and causing instant death. Also badass.
  • The Jaguar population is declining rapidly.
  • Bi-national conservation efforts have been successful at protecting a small population of 80 to 120 Jaguars in the remote mountains of Sonora, Mexico bordering Arizona. This population is the largest of three known to remain in Sonora, and is the last hope for recovery in the United States.
  • The Jaguar once roamed from Argentina in South America all the way up to Arizona’s Grand Canyon. There have actually been sporadic sightings in Arizona in recent years.
  • Jaguars have one of the loudest roars in nature.
  • Jaguars are solitary animals. Males defend a range of up to 60-miles and only come together with females to mate.
  • The Jaguar has one predator – humans.

For your perusal, here’s a gallery of the awesome Jaguar. Enjoy.

[click photo for the awesomeness]

Was anybody besides me hoping for the propeller to get involved?

Good boy. Never a second thought, just went to help because it was the right thing to do.

So Paris Hilton went and tweeted this out a couple days ago . . .

Of course this wasn’t true and the worldwide interweb proceeded to make the necessary corrections. Enjoy . . .

[click the photo to enlarge]

Attaboy, internet.

Nice save, Impalas.

Finally, something to take down that damn flying wolf-dog I showed you the other day. Ladies and gentlemen, the Harpy Eagle is one badass giant flyin’ death machine. It is the largest and most powerful raptor found in the freakin’ rainforest. These bad boys have been known to grow to nearly 30-pounds, man! Their wingspan can reach 6-feet and they can be 3-feet tall. Yikes. Fun Fact: Adult Harpy Eagles give a penetrating, melancholy scream, with the males’ call described as “a whispy screaming or wailing“. That’s cool. Anywho, Harpy Eagle.

Holy mother do we need this guy after that flyin’ wolf I posted the other day. Dang he was horrifying. Check out the little Ili Pika down there though. Little dude is cute and cuddly like you read about. Looks like a Star Wars character or something. For more than 20 years, the Ili Pika had eluded scientists in the Tianshan Mountains of northwestern China. People have seen the furry critter only a handful of times since it was discovered by accident in 1983. In fact, people have spotted only 29-live individuals, and little is known about the animal’s ecology and behavior. Little guy is a mystery, man. Anywho, Ili Pika.

 

Oh sweet Jesus no. Nope. Oh HELL naw. Good Lord almighty that’s chilling to gander at. But yes kids, this nightmare fuel is a real, honest-to-God living creature. Speaking of God, he had to be just messing with is with this guy, huh? “Hey, I’m in a weird mood today. Think I’ll create a flying wolf.” Anyway, this dude lives in Africa and feeds mostly on fruit, toddlers and the occasional drunken native stumbling home from the local watering hole. Seriously, they say just fruit but color me skeptical. I mean, look at this guy. Anywho, African Buttikofer Epaulatted Fruit Bat.

The young bat, named Miss Alicia, was rescued in Queensland, Australia, after a scary encounter with a car left her in need of urgent care. She was taken into the loving arms of bat conservationist Denise Wade and is poised to make a full recovery with no major injuries sustained. She’s also adorable as hell if you haven’t noticed.

Check out the Tree-Kangaroo, man. So cute it hurts. Tree-kangaroos are a lot like regular kangaroos, except they’re twice as fluffy, and almost resemble small tree-dwelling bears. Found mostly in Australia and New Guinea, they are elusive as hell and little is known about their behavior. Though exact population numbers are currently unknown, Tree-Kangaroos face the constant threat of hunting and habitat destruction because, you know, humans are assholes. Anywho, Tree-Kangaroo.

Ever find an old photo and think, “Holy shit, grandma was hot!” Yep, we always seem to think of our parents and grandparents as old, but they too had their heyday. What follows is photographic proof of that, along with comments by people who found them. Check it out, and click on the photo to read the caption.

This Picture Was Next To My Grandmother’s Coffin At Her Funeral

 

Yikes.

God help these glorious animals.

So batshit crazy Charles Manson died at 83 on Sunday after spending 46-years behind bars for the murders of Sharon Tate and six others. Welcome to hell, Charlie.

Anyway, the murders were absolutely terrifying, and if you’ve ever read the book “Helter Skelter” you’ll know why. Chills, man.

Manson, who was once labeled by Rolling Stone as “the most dangerous man alive”, won’t be missed by many. However, for “Breaking Bad” and “Malcom in the Middle” actor Bryan Cranston, the death of the madman caused him to recall a chilling childhood memory.

“Hearing Charles Manson was dead, I shuddered,” Cranston told radio host Dan Patrick. “I was within his grasp just 1-year before he committed the brutal murders in 1969.”

“I didn’t actually meet him,” Cranston said, but he explained he was in very close proximity to him. “Where I grew up in the San Fernando Valley there was an area called Santa Susana Pass that goes from one valley to another. In the middle of this pass was the Spahn Ranch, where they rented horses.”

Cranston went on to say that he and his cousin were renting horses when someone yelled, “Charlie’s on the hill!” People then took off on their horses.
Not knowing what was going on, Cranston and his cousin got on their horses and began riding. Then, about a half hour later, they saw a trail of horses coming toward them.

“In the middle of the pack was a guy holding the reins of the horse behind him,” Cranston recalled. “On the horse behind him was this little bearded guy with big, dead eyes and wild hair.”

The cousins passed Manson, looking at him, but Manson didn’t look over at them. They simply realized that must be the “Charlie” everyone was talking about.

It wasn’t until a year later, when they saw his picture in the paper after the murders, they realized that was the man they saw.

And that, my friends, was a close encounter of a terrifying kind.

Perfect in so many ways. The timing, the reaction of the camera people, everything. And poor Atlanta. First they blow a 28-3 lead against New England in the Super Bowl and now this. City just keeps getting hammered from all angles. Sad really.

PS- Who sets up a camera on the wrong side of the street? Come on Weather Channel. That’s just awful.

Nature, man. Just full of surprises and doin’ it up big per usual. Surprise a minute and I love it. That said, see how many of these amazing facts:

  • A blue whale can make a fart bubble so big that a horse could fit inside it. On a related note, that would really suck for the horse.
  • Sloths poop about once a week and it is massive, up to 1/3 its body weight. Think Uncle Roger at Thanksgiving. Because they’re vulnerable to predators at this time, up to 50% of sloths deaths occur while they’re doing #2.
  • A female wallaby, while running from a predator, will toss her joey from her pouch to reduce her weight as well as to give her pursuer something to snack on. That’s cold, man.
  • Crows will remember individual human faces for their entire lives.
  • An armadillo’s armor is so thick that a bullet once bounced off it and hit the person who fired it. Karma to the max.
  • Female ferrets in heat will die if they don’t get laid.
  • Dolphins can identify humans by checking our skeleton structure through their sonar. They’ve also helped shipwrecked victims by fighting off sharks, because they’re badass.
  • Iceland has no mosquitos.
  • Baby elephants suck on their trunks for comfort, just like human babies suck on their thumbs.
  • Research has shown that dogs appreciate music and have their own musical preference. I know this to be true because my dog Sparky hates Taylor Swift.
  • Male giraffes court other males more often than females, and 94% of giraffe sex takes place between dudes.
  • Kinkajous have the ability to turn their feet around and run just as quickly backwards as they do forwards.
  • When male honey bees mate, their penises explode and they die. During the queens nuptial flight, she’ll have sex with about a dozen males and leave a trail of their dead, penisless corpses in her wake. How romantic.
  • Daddy Long Legs predate the dinosaurs.

See? Guarantee you didn’t know at least some of those. You’re welcome.

Ladies and gentlemen, few things make me happier than seeing a bullfighter gored by a bull. However, one of those things is seeing a bullfighter gored directly in the junk. Job well done bull. Well done indeed.

Listen, having my life threatened because of something I’ve written isn’t new. I’ve been threatened by angry clowns, Nazis, racist rednecks, a crazy lady stalker and even an angry mother of a high school bowler from Cincinnati. Still, this latest threat has me a little flummoxed. See, a few weeks ago I wrote a little something called Do you know a psychopath? which I thought was a fairly innocuous piece about, well, psychopaths. Anyway, a couple days later I received this little missive from some nutjob who has to be out of his gourd. I shall break it down as we go:

YOU, personally, really should weigh your words SERIOUSLY. I strongly advise you to delete this written defamation of a huge group of people who do not take slander and character assassination like this easily.

Well, I sort of assumed psychopaths would not take things lightly, so this part doesn’t surprise me a bit. Psychopaths, man. Thin-skinned like you read about.

I do not know which organization you have got to back you up, but if you do not care about lawsuits in the multi-million dollar range, fine, just keep on doing what you are doing.

HA! First off, these people have no idea what organization I have backing me up, and if they did they’d back off in a heartbeat. Let’s just say The Black Wave has my back.

Bad. Ass.

If you DO care about spending x-amounts of money to try and defend this CLEARLY written libel, then take my advice – DELETE. Your post is now officially been copied and screen-shotted and digitally stored for later use and evidence. This is just a warning. Delete or pay the consequences either monetarily or physically.

Whoa, can you say dark turn? But listen, any threatening letter writer that uses the word screen-shotted is alright by me. Hell, I’m not even mad. That’s amazing.

We are Antifa, we do not forget.

Wait. What? Who? Antifa? The anti-fascist group? Has this psychopath even read my website? Hell, I’m practically Antifa myself, man. C’mon Antifa. You’re better’n ‘at.

Note: No way somebody from Antifa wrote this. Has to be a lone wolf psychopath dude. I’m not rich so a lawsuit means nothing to me, and I ran the IP address and it originated from Arlington, Virginia. That would be a what, a 7-hour drive to kill me? To be safe, Sparky and I shall be on high alert for a few days. Such is the life of a world-famous blogger.

 


Julius Caesar too. And Socrates. And Plato. Hell, even Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart and Beethoven.  But you get the point. There’s a solid chance the water coming out of your faucet or inside that bottle you bought contains molecules that all those people drank. Yes kids, Cleopatra may have sipped that very same water from the Nile back in 33 BC. How in the hell, you ask? Read on . . .

Here’s the dilly. The water on our Earth today is the same water that’s been here for nearly 5-billion years. Only a teeny-tiny bit has escaped out into space, and as far as we know new water hasn’t formed either.

What does that mean? It means there’s a very high chance the water in your glass is what thirsty dinosaurs were gulping about 65-million years ago.

It’s possible that you could drink the same water as a T-Rex or any of those historical figures I mentioned above because of the way water circulates around our planet. You and I are actually part of this water cycle, too.

Here’s what happens. As water on the surface of lakes, oceans, and rivers warms up, it travels into the sky as very tiny droplets, or vapor. When the water vapor gets colder, it turns back to liquid to help form clouds.

When the liquid gets so heavy it can’t stay in the atmosphere anymore, it falls as rain, snow, sleet, hail, or my personal favorite, graupel.* Once the precipitation reaches the ground or lands in lakes, oceans, and rivers, the cycle continues.

*Graupel is snow pellets or soft hail. Feel free to drop that word on your friends this winter.

See, the earth is a closed system with finite resources, and one of those resources is water. That means we don’t get new water or lose water on average; instead, like I said, it mixes and recycles. The same is somewhat true for air, and most everything else on earth, although each substance is different.

This next part is sort of complicated, and since I had to read it 7-times to understand it, you might have to read it twice. From Scientific American:

Water is a chemical substance with a chemical formula of H2O, meaning that its molecule contains one oxygen and two hydrogen atoms connected by covalent bonds. People drink an average amount of 2-quarts of water a day.
Each quart of water contains 3.1634653 x 10^24th power of molecules. Thusly, if a person lives for 75-years, we can calculate them needing roughly 365 x 75 x 2=54,750 quarts of water over their lifetime. That means the average person drinks roughly 54,750 x 3.1634653 x 10^24th power of molecules in their lifetime. There are about 326-million trillion gallons of fresh water on Earth. We have approximately 4.72 X 10^46 molecules of fresh water in total. Thus, there is a fair chance you shared water molecule or two with the Dinosaurs, Jesus, Buddha, Confucius, Julius Caesar, Socrates, or any other human or animal that drank water in history.

So there you go. Interesting stuff, amirite?

Fun Fact: Less than 3% of all the water on Earth is fresh water, the kind we drink. Although you might think that most of the fresh water on Earth is found in lakes and rivers, only a small fraction can be found in these places. Most of the fresh water is frozen in polar ice caps and glaciers. The rest exists in the atmosphere as gas or clouds, or is underground.

Every autumn, millions of Monarch butterflies migrate nearly 3,000 miles from their breeding grounds to spend winter in Mexico. What you see here are trees covered with them. The stick together like this for protection. Cool stuff.

Progress can be a real pain in the ass, ya know? Especially when developers are constructing giant skyscrapers all up in your business and whatnot. And even though the big boys are throwing money at you left and right in an effort to get you to sell, sometimes folks just don’t wanna leave the old homestead. What follows are some of the most stubborn, hard-headed badasses that refused to cave in to big business. And you know what? You can’t help but respect them. Take a look:

Let’s start with Miss Edith Macefield, who refused to sell her humble abode even though she was offered a cool $1,000,000 for it. Fun fact: This house was the inspiration for the movie “Up”. Cool.

Next up we have some dude named Randal Acker. Randall refused to sell his little house in downtown Portland so they built a huge Portland State University Residence Hall around it. Crazy stuff.

Here’s a couple homeowners who stood strong as some jackass developers built around them. Doesn’t look like they have much of a backyard.

Check out this one in Melbourne, Australia. It was actually protected by the government so it was incorporated into the design of the new building. Crazy, man.

Here’s one from Guangzhou, where the authorities had to build the highway around some buildings because three families wouldn’t move. Impressive.

Finally, we have this gem. The house was a duplex in Toronto and one owner wanted to sell, the other not so much. Incredibly, this is the end result.