Map of the Day: How Much Snow Does It Usually Take To Cancel Schools?

Southerners, man.

Here Are 10 Life Hacks To Help You Along The Way

Life, man. It’s not always easy. Lord knows I’ve made more than my share of mistakes. That said, here are a few bits of advice that may help smooth things over for you along the way. You are very welcome.

[Click and scroll for the info]

So Tom Hanks Walks Into A Bar . . .

. . . and sees some drunk dude passed out with his friends. Of course, being Tom Hanks and all he went over to see if the guy was alright. After finding that he was, Tom decided to grab the guy’s cell phone and have some fun with it. Imagine being this guy and waking up to find these pics on your phone. Classic Hanx, man.

Map of the Day: USA Red and Orange Areas With Equal Populations

Coastal regions, man.

These 16 Photos Of Inventions From The Past Are Oddly Cool

Wanna take a historical rollercoaster ride through the past looking at strange old inventions and whatnot? Well, you’ve come to the right place. My crack staff here at Shoe: Untied has done some extensive and exhaustive research and have come up with the Top 20 most fascinating, interesting and weird inventions from the past. Enjoy!

Be sure to click, scroll and read the captions, man. Our temp Sachiko Watanabe is quite proud of them. It’s first effort so be kind in the comments section.

Ever Heard Of Pablo Escobar’s Cocaine Hippos?

Daily Beast – Up to 100 hippopotamuses, all descended from four animals illegally imported into Colombia by the cocaine smuggler Pablo Escobar in the late 1980s, are menacing Colombia’s marshlands and river systems.

Scientists told The Daily Telegraph that the country must now must cull the aggressive “cocaine hippos” that roam the Magdalena river basin, as they are breeding voraciously in the country’s wet and warm climate. In their natural African habitat, hippos have to contend with a long dry season.

Escobar, who was said to be worth a staggering $25-billion at his height, making him the seventh richest man in the world, was known for buying lavish gifts and boasted about literally burning money on occasion to keep his family warm. In 2020, a nephew found a plastic bag with $18-million hidden in the wall of one of his old houses. His zoo, complete with elephants and hippopotamuses, was just one more indulgence.

When he was shot dead in 1993 the Colombian government took control of his estate including the animals, most of which were either euthanized or sent to zoos and parks.

Four renegade hippos, however, living in a remote pond, escaped the cull. Now there are dozens of them living in the wild. The exact number is unknown but the Telegraph puts the number at between 80 and 100, which it says makes them the largest invasive species on the planet. Their numbers will swell to almost 1,500 by 2040 if they are not controlled.

Hippos are famously aggressive and kill more people annually than any other African mammal.

One mooted method of controlling the hippos, sterilization, has been unsuccessful—owing to the fact that male hippos have retractable testes.

OK, a few things here. First off, the term “renegade hippos” sounds sort of horrifying, right? Packs of hippos just storming the Colombian countryside and menacing the locals? Secondly, hippos have retractable testes? Guess that might come in handy when a line drive is heading your way or when you’re teaching your kid to swing a baseball bat. Finally, if I was worth 25-billion I don’t think my first thought would be to buy a bunch of hippos, but what do I know? Different strokes for different folks, that’s my credo. Anywho, I can’t blame Escobar’s Coacine Hippos for running roughshod over a third world. corruption filled, poverty and crime ridden country. Hippos gonna be hippos.

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Nature Video of the Day: Striped Eel Catfish

Striped Eel Catfish swim in one organized group in order to scare predators away. As you can see, they appear to be one large animal. That’s cool man.

Martin Luther King, Jr.: “I Have A Dream”

Martin Luther King Jr. delivered this speech during the March on Washington on August 28, 1963, in which he called for an end to racism in the United States. Delivered to over 250,000 civil rights supporters from the steps of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C., the speech was a defining moment of the American Civil Rights Movement.

Beginning with a reference to the Emancipation Proclamation, which freed millions of slaves in 1863, King observes that: “One hundred years later, the Negro still is not free.” Toward the end of the speech, King departed from his prepared text for a partly improvised “I have a dream” theme. Although largely forgotten in history, this had been prompted by Mahalia Jackson’s cry of “Tell them about the dream, Martin!” King then proceeded to thrill the crowd with what has now become its most famous line, “I have a dream” and all that followed. The speech was ranked the top American speech of the 20th century in a 1999 poll of scholars.

Coast Guard Nabs Tiki Bar Boat Burglar!

KEY WEST, Fla. (WWSB) – Its not a true Wednesday in Florida until a Tiki Bar Boat gets stolen in The Florida Keys.

An unnamed sailor/thief was stopped by the south eastern division of the U.S. Coast Guard just outside of Hawks Chanel. According to The Coast Guard, the man showed had been drinking while operating the buoyant Tiki Hut, which doubles as a bar. The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission took the man into custody after the boat had been recovered.

The Coast Guard’s takeaway advice for the rest of us: “Don’t drink and boat!”

Thank God for the Coast Guard, huh? Without those boys this Tiki Bar Boat burglar would have made his way up the coast and into Tiki Bar Boat lore, just floating up and down the Gulf selling Margaritas, Mai Tais and Rum Runners like a boss. Also some Sweet and Spicy Bacon Kebabs with Scallion-Ginger Relish if I’m being honest. Seriously though, that would be hard to resist. An unmanned Tiki Bar Boat for the taking? I know many a college friend who would have done the same. Not me of course, because that’s stealing. Anyway, good for the Coast Guard I guess?

Instant Karma’s Gonna Get You

Yeah, John Lennon said it best:

Instant Karma’s gonna get you
Gonna knock you right on the head
You better get yourself together
Pretty soon you’re gonna be dead
What in the world you thinking of
Laughing in the face of love
What on earth you tryin’ to do
It’s up to you, yeah you.

Check out the video below, but suffice it to say John knew. Before the video though, take a gander at some tweets exemplifying where karma took a bite out of some folks. Click and scroll man. Click and scroll.

My Father, WVU and Meeting the Legends

Back in 2009 I attended the West Virginia – Louisville game at WVU Coliseum. It was a pretty special night because it was the last game of the season, College GameDay was there, both teams were good, and the 1958-59 Mountaineer team was being honored at halftime. That legendary team, of course, was led by Jerry West and coached by Fred Schaus. As everyone knows Jerry West went on to become of the best players in NBA history. As for Fred Schaus, he only achieved the following . . .

Coach Fred Schaus and Jerry West.

After a 146-37 won-loss record at WVU, he left to coach both Jerry West and Hot Rod Hundley (who I’ve written about before) in the NBA with the Los Angeles Lakers. After leading the Lakers to 7-consecutive NBA playoffs, Schaus left coaching to become the Lakers’ General Manager. He put together the team that in 1972 won an NBA-record 33-straight games and captured an NBA Championship. He then returned to college coaching at Purdue and led the Boilermakers to a 104-60 record. His 1974 team advanced to the NIT finals. That feat got him the distinction of being the nation’s only coach to take teams to the finals of the NCAA, NIT and NBA.

So yeah, Fred Schaus was a pretty big deal. Anyway, a couple days before I headed out to Morgantown I was telling my father about the game. You can imagine my shock when he casually mentioned he and Fred Schaus were old friends.

Wait. What? I’d been involved in basketball, coached at various levels, and Dad had never mentioned he was an old buddy of a bonafide basketball legend?

Sure, he told me. They’d served in the Navy together and were close friends. Seems they met at the ship’s mail boxes because Schaus and Shoemaker were so close in spelling and their letters from home were in the same slot.

Again. Dad, you just decided to tell me this?

Anyway, I get out to Morgantown, check-in to my hotel, and head to the early morning walk-through. I remember walking through the parking lot and passing the GameDay bus where I saw Jay Bilas standing there and taking one last look in the mirror to check his hair (back when he had more hair). I said, “Hey man, you need to take the plunge and join me” as I pointed to my shaved head. He just laughed and said, “Soon man. Soon!” I just laughed and walked into the coliseum.

Later that day game time is approaching so I head back to the coliseum. Coach Huggins has a hospitality room for family and friends that I go to sometimes, so I stopped in there at some point. I’d just grabbed a beer and a sandwich when I looked up and there he was – Jerry West. Now, I’ve been lucky enough to have met a lot of famous people in my lifetime but Jerry West was on a whole other level. This was my childhood hero. I walked up with the intention of introducing myself, and . . . I froze. What can I say? I was overcome with emotion, man. This was Jerry West. The NBA logo. Mr. Clutch. Zeke from Cabin Creek. My freakin’ hero.

Yeah. That logo.

Finally I muttered something about what he’d meant to me, how I’d idolized him, read his book, blah-blah-blah until he finally patted me on the shoulder, smiled and dismissed me for the groveling fanboy that I was.

But let’s get to the point of the story. As the first half was winding to a close I went down in the tunnel where the locker rooms are, basically because I wanted to see the guys from that 1958-59 team. They were all there waiting to be introduced, including legends Jerry West, Willie Akers and Head Coach Fred Schaus. Coach Schaus was in a wheelchair and clearly not well. He was at the end of the line and was the last to be introduced to the crowd, right after Jerry West. I walked up to him and we had this quick conversation:

“Coach, my name is Dave Shoemaker. You served in the Navy with my father. He was . . .”

“Ralph? Hell yes! Great guy. You look just like him. Tell him I said hello.”

I was shocked. According to Dad he hadn’t seen Fred Schaus since 1945. That was 64-years from the year 2009. Pretty amazing really.

Believe me, when I told Dad later that Fred Schaus remembered him he just beamed. It was a special moment. However, and even bigger moment was to come.

The other players from that 1958-59 were being introduced one by one as I was having that conversation, and as I heard the announcer reading Coach Schaus’s accomplishments and the two guys behind his wheelchair (his sons maybe?) began pushing him out from the tunnel, towards the famous Mountaineer carpet and onto the coliseum floor. Then, something pretty cool happened. I watched him hold up his hand, stop them, and proceed to stand up. He stood proudly, head held high, and walked onto to court as the crowd went wild. The guys with him protested, but only for a second. He wanted to walk onto that damn floor, and by West By God Virginia he did.

I’ll never forget it. Here’s the video:

Wait for Coach Schaus at the end of the video.

Fred Schaus died about 3-years later, but I’ll never forget that night. Although he was obviously not well he displayed a grace and dignity that was astounding. And the fact that he remembered my father from 64-years prior was icing on the cake.

Unforgettable memory.

This Video Where Michael Scott Is Everyone In The Office Is Quite Unsettling

The internet can be a dark and disturbing place.

Wanna Watch A Boeing 727 Crash? Here Ya Go.

Fascinating video.

The Last Surviving Civil War Widow Died This Week and WHAT THE HELL?

KIds, the Civil War ended in 1865. 1865! That’s 155-years ago dude. How is this possible you ask? Well, here ye be:

Yep, this just happened. Mind blown.

Let’s Compare The Top Selling Albums of 2020 To The Top Selling Albums of 1970

At the end of every December I peruse the Top Selling Albums list and every year I become more and more baffled, befuddled and bemused. Some of the artist’s names are unrecognizable, some have been around awhile, and there are always a few shockers from the past sprinkled within. The latter usually happens when someone dies and people get nostalgic for their music. Sometimes a movie will bring back music from the past and that will spur sales. Of course the older you get the less artists you recognize. Hell, back in 1970 the Top 20 best selling albums were as follows, and I not only knew every band but I owned 16 of them.

I owned the albums with an asterisk, and keep in mind that some of them were actually released in 1969 but were still selling big in 1970.

1. Bridge Over Troubled Water* – Simon and Garfunkel. Not a huge S & G fan but I had the record.
2. Led Zeppelin II* – Led Zeppelin. Stellar LP. So good. Whole Lotta Love? The Lemon Song? Come on man.
3. Abbey Road* – The Beatles. My favorite Beatles album, period.
4. Santana* – Santana. Full of killer geetar licks.
5. Get Ready* – Rare Earth. Just a great album by the first white act signed by Motown. The 23-minute version of Get Ready is fantastic.
6. Joe Cocker!* – Joe Cocker. Joe covered The Beatles’ She Came In Through The Bathroom Window and Something on this record. Good stuff.
7. Captured Live at The Forum* – Three Dog Night. If you haven’t heard the song Chest Fever you’re missing out, man. Amazing song.
8. Blood, Sweat and Tears* – Blood, Sweat and Tears. David Clayton-Thomas had a helluva set of pipes.
9. Sweet Baby James* – James Taylor. JT’s second album, and it contained the classic song Fire and Rain.
10. In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida – Iron Butterfly. Never bought it although I did have the song the album was named for.
11. American Woman* – The Guess Who. Great album and song about America by a Canadian band.
12. Grand Funk* – Grand Funk Railroad. Great second album by the boys from Flint, Michigan.
13. Raindrops Keep Fallin’ On My Head – B.J. Thomas. BJ had some good tunes, but I never bought one of his albums.
14. Chicago Transit Authority* – Chicago. Chock full of great songs like Does Anybody Know What Time It Is?, Beginnings and Questions 67 and 68.
15. McCartney* – Paul McCartney. Paul’s first solo album and it contained the tune Maybe I’m Amazed. ‘Nuff said.
16. Tom Jones Live in Las Vegas – Tom Jones. Uh, no.
17. Engelbert Humperdinck – Engelbert Humperdinck. Nope.
18. Green River* – Creedence Clearwater Revival. Bad Moon Rising? Green River? Great album.
19. Cosmo’s Factory* – Creedence Clearwater Revival. CCR was smokin’ in ’69 and ’70, man. This one included Lookin’ Out My Back Door and Who’ll Stop the Rain.
20. Let It Be* – The Beatles. Let It Be was the last Beatles album ever released, but not the last recorded. That would be Abbey Road. But with Something, Across the Universe, Let It Be, The Long and Winding Road and Get Back included this LP could not go wrong.

Man, looking back that’s one helluva list, right? Wow. Anyway, let’s fast forward 50-years to the year 2020. Below you will find the top sellers from the past 12-months:

1. Folklore – Taylor Swift. I don’t own it nor have I heard it but I think Taylor Swift is a really talented artist. Not surprising that she holds the top spot.
2. Fine Line – Harry Styles. I believe this guy was in a boy band called One Direction or something. I also think he has weird hair. That’s all I got. Don’t own it.
3. Map of the Soul:7 – BTS. Korean boy band, right? Don’t own it.
4. After Hours – The Weeknd. Meh. I know of him. Not a big fan. Don’t own it.
5. When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go? – Billie Eilish. Yeah, I’ve heard some of her stuff and I don’t hate it but I don’t own it.
6. What You See Is What You Get – Luke Combs. I’m not a huge country guy but I know who Luke Combs is and I have a couple of his songs on my iPhone. Don’t own the album though.
7. Chromatica – Lady Gaga. Lady Gaga is still making music? I had no idea. Don’t own it.
8. Lover – Taylor Swift. Taylor again. Not shocked but I don’t own it.
9. Lovers Never Die – Juice WRLD. Who? And what’s with these youngsters and their lack of spelling skills? Don’t own it.
10. Manic – Halsey. I’ve never heard a Halsey song but I’ve seen her on TV a few times. Obviously don’t own it. I’m 0 for 10 so far. Woot!
11. Abbey Road – The Beatles. YES! Love it! An album released 50-years ago makes the Top 20. Incredible really. There’s hope for humanity! Of course I own it.
12. NCT#127: Neo Zone, The Second Album. I have no idea what I just typed. Do not own.
13. Here and Now – Kenny Chesney. I swear I thought this was a Chesney album from the 90s until I looked it up and found it was released in May of 2020. Haven’t heard a song from it. Don’t own.
14. Music To Be Murdered By – Eminem. Love Eminem. Have for 20-years. Even though it got some poor reviews I like this record. Own it!
15. Greatest Hits – Queen. I’m sure this was due to the movie Bohemian Rhapsody and that’s fine by me. I’ve owned it since 1981.
16. Fully Loaded: God’s Country – Blake Shelton. Never knew he had a new album out and that’s a weird title, man. Do not own.
17. Legend: The Best of Bob Marley. A Reggae Greatest Hits album in the Top 20 after 36-years? Love it, own it.
18. Changes – Justin Bieber. Here’s another case of me not realizing an artist was still recording. Seriously had no idea. Don’t own it.
19. Don’t Smile At Me – Billie Eilish. This kid again. Don’t own.
20. No Pressure – Logic. Never heard of Logic so I had to check him out. Turns out he’s a 30-year old white rapper who appears to be 15 and sneers at the camera a lot. Shocking I know. One of his videos features Gumby smoking a joint, so there’s that. Do not own.

So according to my math I owned 80% of the Top 20 albums in 1970 and 20% of the Top 20 albums of 2020. Howevuh, the four albums I own that were in the Top 20 this year were released in 1970 (Beatles), 1981 (Queen), 1984 (Bob Marley), and 2020 (Eminem). I guess Eminem is my last grasp at being a relevant music listener?*

*Eminem is 48. Sigh.

The truth is few people even buy entire albums anymore and that’s a damn shame. We use to go out and buy an album, bring it home, tear off the plastic cover, and pour over the lyrics and other information as we listened to the album on the turntable. It was always great to discover some gem of a song, usually buried somewhere on Side 2. Now? We download a song from our computer or our cell phone. Nobody buys entire albums anymore, thus missing out on some great music.

Wait. Am I raving like a lunatic, longing for times of yore? I believe I am. But Dylan Thomas said we’re supposed to rage against the dying of the light, right? Not go softly and whatnot? That’s the way I prefer to look at it. And hey, as long as Beatles music is still out there I have hope for owning a top seller in the future, right? Right?

PS- God I hope I’m right.