Iggy Azalea and Nick Young Break Up, Go to Social Media to Articulate Their Thoughts

That’s Iggy on the left and Swaggy on the right. Thought I should clarify.

So below average singer Iggy Azalea and way below average basketball player Nick “Swaggy P” Young called off their engagement yesterday, an event apparently so cataclysmic that the earth shifted on its axis for a moment, but only in the minds of people who have, you know, no lives.

Anywho, as is the way of the modern human, both went to social media to articulate the depth of their feelings regarding this earth-shattering crisis.

Azalea chose Instagram as her worldwide portal, baring her innermost soul for all to see:

“Unfortunately although I love Nick and have tried to rebuild my trust in him – It’s become apparent in the last few weeks I am unable to,” Azalea, 26, wrote on Instagram Sunday. “I genuinely wish Nick the best. It’s never easy to part ways with the person you planned your entire future with, but futures can be rewritten and as of today mine is a blank page.”

So sad, amirite? Iggy’s clearly heartbroken. Still, her Instagram post was classy and yes, even poignant.

The ever-eloquent Young also took to social media to articulate his nuanced thoughts on the break-up, offering the following missive on Twitter:

“Single.”

I visualize Swaggy P staring at his phone, pondering his words (word) before typing them (it), and this is what he came up with. But hey, I guess keeping it simple has its merits too, huh?

Anyway, true love is dead, people. True love is dead. Yet somehow, as a nation we must carry on.

That is all.