Posts Tagged ‘Married to Jonas’

Completely unposed candid shot.

Yeah, I was watching the E! channel this afternoon because a show was on called, “50 Most Shocking Hollywood Murders” or something like that. What can I say, I’m intrigued by the fact that you can apparently kill your wife in Hollywood and walk away with a stern talking-to from the judge.

Think O.J. and Robert Blake, that sort of thing.

Anyway, I made a terrible mistake. I fell asleep. What happened then was, a show called “Married to Jonas” came on. I was in a state of semi-consciousness, so I was sort of half-asleep and half-listening, ya know? Apparently this drivel is a regular show and is about one of the Jonas Brothers and his new wife. Here’s what the TV Info says about one particular show:

Pre-Dinner Jitters: The in-laws are coming over for a big family dinner, and Dani wants to make sure everything’s perfect.

I’m getting chills thinking about that thrill-fest. DVR’d as we speak, except not really.

All I know is, the wife (I guess Dani or is that the Jonas brother?) talks like a Prozac-filled automaton and he’s the ugly Jonas brother. Not that I think the others are cute, because, you know, I don’t roll that way. He just looks ugly to me. I think he used to have curly hair maybe. I do know he has a really bad semi-beard now and, between you and me, he may not have come to grips with his sexuality yet.

If you know what I mean.

But that’s not the point of this blog, incredibly interesting as it is. The thing that struck me was how the wife kept droning on about she craves normalcy in her life, how horrific the touring life is, how it sucks so much to be married to a gazzillionaire. OK, she didn’t say that last part, I just threw it in there for irony’s sake.

What I really want to say is, “Really, Jonas Brother’s wife?” What, was he a plumber when you met him? You had no idea then he was, you know, sort of famous? Well, with 11-year old girls certain crowds anyway? NOW you’re bitching?

Good God.

Oh, and by the way, she’s trying to get pregnant. Without going into the evil  intentions of certain types of ladies, this did not surprise me.

But the worst part? Even after I was fully awake I watched the rest of the show.

I hate myself right now.