Archive for the ‘Movies’ Category


Dolls, death and little kids. Chilling, man.

The Lebowski-inspired Church of the Latter-Day Dude says it has ordained over 400,000 Dudeist priests. On a related note, I have found my calling. Here’s the actual link: The Church of the Latter-Day Dude. I’m all in, bro. After all, the Dude abides.

So I read somewhere the other day that Seinfeld’s last episode aired 19-years ago and I was sort of shocked. Anyway, it got me to thinking, which often leads to something like you’re about to read. What follows are 10 things that will turn 30-years old in 2017, and some are pretty surprising. Read on . . .

Full House

Yep, the TV show with the obnoxious, mouthy little girl began 30-years ago. I blame Michelle for all the little disrespectful punks that have come since. Damn you Michelle Tanner. Damn you to hell.

The Princess Bride

If you don’t recognize the line, “Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die”, well then, you need to rent this movie poste haste because you’re living a life unfulfilled. Anyway, 30-years old.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Yessir, Donatello, Leonardo, Michelangelo, and Raphael kicked off with their cartoon back in ’87. Since then we’ve seen toys, TV shows. movies, and a ton of other stuff.

Disposable Contact Lenses

Yes kids, there was one a day when people had to carefully take out there contact lenses, put them in a little container, and repeat the exercise every night. Barbaric, I know.

Panera Bread

If you’ve never had their Pasta Primavera with Shrimp you’re a dirty rotten communist. Again, seems like yesterday.

Red Bull

Yep, some dude from Austria mixed some caffeine, sugar, taurine, niacin, jackal urine and some other stuff and came up with Red Bull. Fun Fact: According to the exhaustive research done by my crack staff, the energy drink biz exploded in 2005. I have no idea why. Anywho, I’m a Rock Star guy myself.

The Simpsons

Yep, it all started on the Tracey Ullman Show. Memba her? Bart and his family were featured in short cartoons during that show.

Dirty Dancing

Nobody puts Baby in a corner, man. The Swayze at the peak of his powers.

Congressional Ban On Inflight Smoking

Hard to believe it now but there once was a time when people smoked everywhere – in airplanes, on TV, in restaurants, bars, even hospitals. Crazy times fo sho.

“The Drive”

Sorry, Cleveland fans, but this Fall is the anniversary of John Elway’s drive to beat you in the playoffs. Good thing all those Super Bowl wins have made up for it since then though.


A Bunch of Famous People

Yep. Ronda Rousey, Kesha, Lil Bow Wow (was he the first of the “Lils”?), Kendrick Lamar, Blake Lively, Wiz Khalifa, and Zac Efron were all born in ’87. Man, that was a shitty year for celebrity birthdays, wasn’t it? Good Lord.

Where was I, you ask? Teaching Reading, and a few other things, to Greenfield McClain to bunch of unsuspecting Junior High kids.

Howzabout you?

Because it is weird as hell. And also amazing.

Well, it was an Alfred Hitchcock movie, so I guess the weirdness is to be expected. Released in 1948, it’s about two men who decide that they’re intellectually superior human beings, so they strangle a friend of theirs, put him in a trunk in their apartment, and proceed to have a dinner party with the food served from the top of the very trunk containing their buddy’s dead body.

Good times, huh?

It shouldn’t be a surprise that I like this movie, because it is said Hitch got the idea from the famous Leopold and Loeb murder back in 1923 from which the book “For the Thrill of It” was written.* Yes, I happened to love that book. Loved the movie “Compulsion” too, and it was based on the same murder. Nathan Leopold and Richard Loeb were two college students from Chicago who killed a 14-year old kid just because they thought they were superior intellects and could get away with it. They believed they could commit the “perfect murder” if you will, but hey, who hasn’t?

*As I was doing research for thes article, I found there was actually a play called “Rope” that was performed in 1929.

The film is notable for taking place in real time and being edited so as to appear as a single continuous shot through the use of long takes. Trust me, watch it and that will all make sense.

It stars Jimmy Stewart, Farley Granger and others, and it is dark and twisted. Here’s the plot as described in

Two brilliant young aesthetes, Brandon Shaw and Phillip Morgan, strangle to death their former classmate from Harvard University, David Kentley, in their apartment. They commit the crime as an intellectual exercise; they want to prove their superiority by committing the “perfect murder”.

After hiding the body in a large antique wooden chest, Brandon and Phillip host a dinner party at the apartment, which has a panoramic view of Manhattan’s skyline. The guests, who are unaware of what has happened, include the victim’s father Mr. Kentley and aunt Mrs. Atwater; his mother is not able to attend due to a cold. Also there are his fiancée, Janet Walker and her former lover Kenneth Lawrence, who was once David’s close friend.

Brandon uses the chest containing the body as a buffet table for the food, just before their housekeeper, Mrs. Wilson arrives to help with the party. “Now the fun begins,” Brandon says when the first guests arrive . . .

You’ll have to watch the movie to see what happens next, but trust me when I say it’s intense, gripping, and heart-stopping.

Man, this movie is right up my alley and I can’t believe it’s been out for 69-years and I’ve just discovered it.

Better late than never I guess? Anyway, watch this movie. For a taste, here’s the original trailer:



So I tried to watch the Oscars Sunday night and lasted about seven and a half minutes. Why? Because although I love movies I hate pompous, self-important actors who have a complete lack of self-awareness. Good Lord, they pretend to be somebody else and get paid for it. Hey, I’ve pretended to be someone else through several relationships, didn’t get paid for it, and actually lost money. That’s not fair, is it?

Anyway, I’m sick of hearing melodramatic actors talk about how important they are, then shower adulation on each other like they’re all Mother Teresa or something. The video below is a great example of what I’m talking about. It’s somebody named Viola Davis giving her acceptance speech and it’s nauseating. The lowlight was when she actually uttered this line:

“We are the only profession that celebrates what it means to live a life.”

Boom! Guess all you firefighters, pediatric surgeons, pastors, obstetricians and EMTs don’t know anything about celebrating what it means to live a life. What a bunch of underachieving, meaningless life living losers you are. Actors, man.

Anyhoo, check it out. She blathered on longer but you’ll get the gist. Oh, and I love it when she’s going on about Denzel Washington and he looks at her like, “Nah, we don’t really work for a living. Chillax.”

So, in a nutshell that’s why I can’t watch. She’s acting like pretending to be somebody else in a movie is the only important profession on earth. It is not. Good God.


The mask used by Michael Myers in the original “Halloween” movie was actually a Captain Kirk from Star Trek mask painted white, due to low budget.



Jimmy Chitwood, the hero of the film Hoosiers, has only four lines in the entire movie.



In 1977, 20th Century Fox had so little faith in the “Star Wars” franchise that they gave away all of the movie licensing and merchandising rights to George Lucas in exchange for his $500,000 directorial fee. In 2014, the overall value of the franchise was estimated at $37-billion.





Once again, pure comedy.



Pure comedy.


Movie trailers were used to be shown after the movie, which is why they were called “trailers”. That practice did not last long, because patrons tended to leave the theater after the films ended, but the name has stuck. Trailers are now shown before the film begins.



When George Lucas was mixing the American Graffiti soundtrack, he numbered the reels of film starting with an R and numbered the dialog starting with a D. Sound designer Walter Murch asked George for Reel 2, Dialog 2 by saying “R2D2”. George liked the way that sounded so much he integrated that into another project he was working on.



If Tommy Boy Were A Drama

Posted: September 30, 2016 in Humor, Movies

Love it.


Really good stuff here. Take a look.


David Huddleston, a noted character actor who was most famously known david-huddleston-deadfor the titular role in “The Big Lebowski” died Tuesday at 85. His wife, Sarah Koeppe, told the Los Angeles Times that he died of heart and kidney disease in Santa Fe, N.M.

Huddleston’s character in the 1998 “The Big Lebowski” epitomized the types of characters he was known for — big dons or capos and tempestuous men. Although he is in only a few scenes in the film, he crosses paths with Jeff Bridges’ Lebowski character, aka “The Dude,” after a group of gang members attack “The Dude” mistaking him for Huddleston’s millionaire Lebowski. Though the film was not a hit when it first premiered, it has since become a huge cult sensation with a devoted fan base.

Well, hell. I’m just devastated over here. The guy who played Big Lebowski is dead? Say it ain’t so. Crushing news. That’s one of my favorite movies ever, period. Who’s next, John Goodman? Steve Buscemi? For the love of God, Jeff Bridges?

Now if you’ll excuse me I need a minute.




CNN20th Century Fox is apologizing for an “X-Men: Apocalypse” promotional image showing Jennifer Lawrence’s character Mystique being strangled by villain Apocalypse. The grim image was plastered on roadside billboards, posters and is featured in the movie’s trailer.

Social media has been smoldering over the ads showing such violence to a woman and that “battery can be fun.”

The film studio responded to the backlash by saying that they were removing the image from promotional materials. “In our enthusiasm to show the villainy of the character Apocalypse we didn’t immediately recognize the upsetting connotation of this image in print form,” Fox said in a statement. “Once we realized how insensitive it was, we quickly took steps to remove those materials. We apologize for our actions and would never condone violence against women.”

Uh, let’s see here. In the photo we have a blue fictional mermaid superhero shapeshifter being choked by a cartoon bad guy. They’re not real people. This has nothing to do with women. It has nothing to do with battery. It has everything to do with pretend cartoon characters we’ve known since the 1960’s and what’s about to happen to the good guy (or in this case the good girl) in the upcoming movie. What’s the point of having a female superhero if you can’t place her in some sort of danger?

Good Lord.

Can’t wait for this one.


Jimmy Chitwood, the hero of the movie Hoosiers, has only four lines in the entire movie.



These guys are hilarious. If you want to see the ultimate Key & Peele video, watch The Substitute Teacher. Classic, man.


I’m a big movie guy. I just love the movies and have since I was a kid. Some of my fondest memories were of my Mom and Dad telling us to put on our pajamas early on a Friday or Saturday night. That could only mean loading up into our wide-track Pontiac and rolling to the Fiesta Drive-In.

Everything was better at the Drive-In, including the pizza. And I used to love it when people would start honking their horns as it started to get dark, demanding that the movies begin.

Of course, everything was also better years later when I used to take dates there. Man, those dusk-to-dawn marathons were cool beans. One of the Unwritten Rules of the Drive-In was to not bother anyone parked in the back row. On a related note, if you asked a date, “Where do you wanna park? Back row OK?” and she said yes, well, let’s just say that was what you wanted to hear. Good times.

Sparky loves movies too, but I can only watch Air Bud and Beverly Hills Chihuahua so many times. On a related note, we watched Old Yeller once and Spark went under the bed and never came out for 3-hours. Spark hates to show weakness.

And you know what? Some movies just never touched me like they seem to touch other people. Example? Forrest Gump. Watched it, watched it again, sort of shrugged my shoulders and went, “Meh.”

So shoot me.

I LOVE the old horror movies, movies like The Wolfman and Creature from the Black Lagoon. I always looked forward to Friday nights at 11:30 when I got to stay up and watch Chiller Theater. The intro was unforgettable . . . “Out of the swirling mist . . .” Just horrifying as a kid. In fact, I’ve always loved all the old B-Movies like “Attack of the 50-foot Woman”, “Psycho Beach Party” and “Plan 9 from Outer Space.”

Just pure entertainment.

Movies are proof that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. For instance, IMDb has The Wizard of Oz rated at #152 in its list of 250 Greatest Movies of all-time. B-W-A-H-A-H-A-H-A-H-A-H-A! Oh, and it has WALL-E at #60. B-W-A-H-A-H-A-H-A-H-A!!!!!!!

Sorry, but that’s just wrong. But on to some of my favorite movies. I’ll list them in no particular order. Let us begin . . .

Hi Fidelity (2000)

I love almost anything John Cusack is in (ever watch Grosse Pointe Blank?Being John Malkovich?), but this is his best movie in my opinion. I know my friend Hanif Abdurraqib would agree. The movie is about a guy (Cusack) who owns a record store and details his problems with his girlfriend and co-workers. There are a lot of music references which also apppeals to me.

Favorite quote by Rob, Cusack’s character:

Rob: “Should I bolt every time I get that feeling in my gut when I meet someone new? Well, I’ve been listening to my gut since I was 14 years old, and frankly speaking, I’ve come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains.”

What can I say? I can relate.

American Psycho (2000)

My friends, I absolutely love this movie. Just a bizarre, dark, funny, twisted film. And it stars Christian Bale, one of my favorite actors. It is exactly what I prefer in my cinematic fare. I mean, how can you beat a guy hatcheting another man to death to the tune “Hip to Be Square” by Huey Lewis and the News? Answer? You can’t. And the fact that said murderee was Jared Leto makes it even better. The movie is about a Wall Street guy who happens to be a serial killer.

My favorite scene among many is when the main character, Patrick Bateman, is having a conversation with a girl he has taken back to his apartment. Since he is a serial killer, he and her are talking about two completely different things . . .

Patrick Bateman: “I think if you stay, something bad will happen. I think I might hurt you. You don’t want to get hurt, do you?”
Jean: “No. No, I guess not. I don’t want to get bruised.”

Chilling but humorous at the same time. Well, at least to me. Love it. Oh, and the scene where he chases the hooker down his apartment stairs with a chainsaw while naked is priceless.

The Big Lebowski (1998)

The Dude.

If you haven’t seen this movie please don’t tell me. I love this movie so much I’ve been looking for a sweater like the one worn by The Dude (played by Jeff Bridges) since 1998. ATTENTION FORMER STUDENTS: Get me this sweater! Anywho, the movie is about an unemployed Los Angeles slacker and avid bowler, referred to as “The Dude”. After a case of mistaken identity, The Dude is introduced to a millionaire also named Jeffrey Lebowski. When the millionaire Lebowski’s trophy wife is later kidnapped, he commissions The Dude to deliver the ransom to secure her release. Needless to say, the plan goes awry.

Favorite quote:

The Dude: “That rug really tied the room together.”

If you’ve seen the movie you’re smiling right now. If you didn’t you really need to see this movie.

In Cold Blood (1967)

Based on the classic novel by Truman Capote, this movie chilled me to the core. The film follows the trail of Perry Smith and Richard Hickock. They break into the home of the Clutter family in Holcomb, Kansas, kill all four members of the family, go on the run, are found and caught by the police, tried for the murders and eventually executed. Robert Blake is great as one of the killers in this movie. They had heard in prison that the Clutters had a buch of money hidden in their house and just showed up, killed the entire family, and left with nothing. Did I mention this book and movie was based on actual events? In addition, the scene where they are hanged is so real you feel as if you are right there.

Here’s a quote:

Perry: “I didn’t want to harm the man.  I thought he was a very nice gentleman.  Soft-spoken.  I thought so right up to the moment I cut his throat.”


The Wizard of Oz (1939)

Yep, I love the Wizard of Oz. Always have, always will. Love everything about it. The music, the munchkins, all the characters, the message, everything. Even as a little kid I understood that this movie was telling me that it would do no good to look elsewhere for anything. Everything you ever need is right there inside you already. They used to show this movie on a yearly basis, I believe right before Thanksgiving for some reason. Whatever. I never missed it. I love the song “Over the Rainbow”, and if you’ve never heard the live version by Eric Clapton you’re missing out. Believe it or not I have 11 versions of this song in my collection, from the movie version by Judy Garland to Clapton to Me First and the Gimme Gimmes. Just a stellar, classic song.

To this day, when Dorothy whispers into the Scarecrow’s ear, “I think I’m wizardgoing to miss you most of all“, I get teary eyed. And as Dorothy’s preparing to leave and the Tin Man says, “Now I know I’ve got a heart, . . . ’cause it’s breaking“, if you don’t feel your heart breaking a little, well, you have no soul.

And it’s OK to admit it, folks. Those Flyin’ Monkeys were absolutely petrifying. When they tried to burn the Scarecrow to death I nearly wet myself. As a kid I had nightmares about those things. Damn you Flyin’ Monkeys!

Note: I’ve no idea if this is true, but I once read that Ray Bolger, the actor who played the Scarecrow, once worked in as an accountant or something in a large company. Legend has it he was fired for dancing in the hallway. Cool.

It is now time for a short interlude to talk about my favorite actress, the enchanting Kate Beckinsale. I love Kate Beckinsale movies for two reasons:

#1 – Kate Beckinsale is in them.

#2 – See #1.

Have mercy.

And now, back to the movies . . .

Taxi Driver (1976)

Quite simply, Robert DeNiro’s finest moment. No offense, Bob, but there was no way you could ever match your performance in this classic. It’s about a taxi driver who is going through some major shit, which culminates in an assassination attempt against a US Senator who is running for president. But this movie is so, so much more. I was in college at the time and this flick absolutely mesmerized me. In addition to DeNiro, it features Cybill Shephard, Peter Boyle, Albert Brooks, Harvey Keitel, an an ungodly performance by Jodie Foster as a teenage hooker. I can’t explain it all here, but trust me, it’s an American classic.

The best moment comes when DeNiro, as Travi Bickle, is getting ready to cause some havoc and is in his apartment looking in the mirror as he practices drawing his gun . . .

You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me? Then who the hell else are you talking… you talking to me? Well I’m the only one here. Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to? Oh yeah? OK.

One of the greatest scenes in movie history, period.

Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986)

I have to admit it, one of the reasons I love this movie is because my son Kip and I have watched it literally 45 times, and I may be underestimating that number. It’s the one movie where, if I happen to come upon it while perusing the channels, I simply cannot change the channel. I have to see it through. I’m not gonna go through the plot because you all know it’s about a high school kid skipping school and going on an epic adventure.

Highlight? Ferris crashing a Chicago parade and lip-synching to “Twist and Shout” by The Beatles.

Favorite line, by the school secretary as she describes Ferris to the principal:

Oh, he’s very popular Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wastoids, dweebies, dickheads – they all adore him. They think he’s a righteous dude.”

And he was.

The Sixth Sense (1999)

Anyone who says they saw the ending coming is a lying son-of-a-bitch. Y’all know it’s about a guy who was murdered but doesn’t know he’s deceased. It’s probably the only movie I ever watched where there was a collective gasp from the audience when everyone realized, for the first time, that the character played by Bruce Willis was, in fact, DEAD. A young Haley Joel Osment was excellent as a kid who, well, “saw dead people.”

With that in mind, my favorite quote is from Osment’s character whe he says . . .

I see dead people.”

This was M. Night Shyamalan’s best movie, and he’s been trying to match its excellence ever since.

Not gonna happen.

Cool Hand Luke (1967)

My favorite Paul Newman role, and it was simply one of the most impactful movies I ever watched. Newman, as Luke, is put in a Florida prison for 2-years for getting drunk and kicking the tops off of parking meters. He gradually wins the hearts of his fellow inmates as he is gradually broken in spirit by the prison warden. Just when you think he’s beaten, though, we get a surprise and then . . . a sad but ultimately satisfying ending.

Memorable quote, by Luke of course: “Yeah well . . .  sometimes nothing can be a real cool hand.”

Hoosiers (1986)

I’m a basketball coach, so of course I liked Hoosiers.

Based on a true story, it’s the tale of a tiny Indiana high school that makes it all the way to the state championship game where they face a school much bigger than theirs. There’s a great plot involving an old school coach, his alcoholic assistant, and Jimmy Chitwood, the best player in the school.

Without a doubt my favorite sports movie, period.

Favorite line (by Jimmy Chitwood) during  the team’s final time-out:

“I’ll make it.”

And of course, I love this one by Coach Norman Dale:

My practices aren’t designed for your enjoyment.”

Amen coach. Amen.

Sling Blade (1996)

When I started watching Sling Blade for the very first time I didn’t think I could stand Karl Childer’s voice for more than 10-minutes. I thought it was excruciating to listen to. But miraculously, as the movie progressed, I grew to grow quite fond of it.  Billy Bob Thornton is simply incredible in this movie, as you completely buy in to his character. This movie about a mentally handicapped man who befriends a young boy and ultimately protects him and his mother is just a great great story.

Memorable line:

Doyle: “What’cha doin’ with that lawn mower blade Karl?”
Karl: “I aim to kill you with it.”

And he did. Classic.

Fargo (1996)

The definition of a “dark” crime-comedy. I absolutely love this movie and it’s, in my opinion, the best Coen Brothers film ever. PeriodHere’s the plotline:

In the winter of 1987, Minneapolis automobile salesman Jerry Lundegaard (Macy) is in financial trouble. Jerry is introduced to criminals Carl Showalter (Buscemi) and Gaear Grimsrud (Stormare) by Native American ex-convict Shep Proudfoot (Reevis), a mechanic at his dealership. Jerry travels to Fargo, North Dakota and hires the two men to kidnap his wife Jean (Rudrüd) in exchange for a new 1987 Oldsmobile Cutlass Ciera and half of the $80,000 ransom. However, Jerry intends to demand a much larger sum from his wealthy father-in-law Wade Gustafson (Presnell) and keep most of the money for himself.

Let’s just say that after that things take an ugly turn.

I can’t talk about this movie without mentioning Frances McDormand as Marge Gunderson, the pregnant cop who pursues the killers. Her performance is un-freaking-believable.

Best line:

Yah, you betcha.”

Just watch the damn movie.

Shane (1953)

This film touched me from the moment I first watched it as a kid and instilled in me a love for movies. It’s plot is classic:

A stranger, wearing buckskin and a six shooter, calling himself Shane (Alan Ladd), rides into an isolated valley in the sparsely settled territory of Wyoming. Whatever his past, he’s obviously skilled as a gunslinger and soon finds himself drawn into a conflict between homesteader Joe Starrett (Van Heflin) and ruthless cattle baron Rufus Ryker (Emile Meyer), who wants to force Starrett and the others off the land.

Long story short, Ryker hires Jack Wilson, a legendary quickdraw, to come and challenge Shane, who is on Starrett’s side. He does, and the ending is spectacular. Shane, who has vowed to never strap on his gun again, of course does. The final showdown is what great film is all about.

Memorable line, from Shane himself:

“A gun is a tool, Marian; no better or no worse than any other tool: an axe, a shovel or anything. A gun is as good or as bad as the man using it. Remember that.”

If you claim to be a movie buff, watch this movie.

Honorable Mention:

Old School (2003) – “I think I see Blue. He looks . . . glorious.”

Halloween (1978) – Sheriff: “A man wouldn’t do that.”  Dr. Loomis: “This isn’t a man”.

A History of Violence (2005)  – One of the greatest movies of recent years, without a doubt, in my opinion.

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004) – “That’s bush. Bush league.”

Night of the Living Dead (1968) – Horrifying opening scene. Just chilling.

The Chumscrubber (2005) – Little known and unheralded, but I thought it was stellar.

Alpha Dog (2006) – Justin Timberlake is great as a drug dealer in this movie.

Out of Sight (1998) – Loved this movie starring George Clooney and Jennifer Lopez.

So there ya go, my favorite movies. Like I said, 20-people walking out of a theater can have 20-different opinions. That said, what are your favorites?

I’d love to hear ’em.

Originally published on February 9th, 2013.

“Do you believe in Jesus?”

“Yes I do.”

“Well, you’re gonna need him.”


I sat down with my crack staff here at Shoe: Untied yesterday and we attempted to come up with our favorite Christmas Movie characters, and there’s no other way to say it – it turned ugly. So much for the Christmas spirit, huh? Anyway, after much disagreement, screaming, and yes, fisticuffs, we narrowed it down to our Top 5.

Here’s our list. Feel free to tell us who we missed. As always, we won’t listen.

1. Cousin Eddie (National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation – 1989)

Yep, Cousin Eddie, the “huge, beastly, bulging man” himself. If you’ve seen the movie and don’t understand that description, you weren’t paying close enough attention. The fact that Randy Quaid didn’t receive an Oscar for this performance is beyond comprehension. And to think it went to Kevin Kline for his role in “A Fish Called Wanda.” Blasphemy.

Favorite Quote: “You know that metal plate in my head? I had to have it replaced, cause every time Catherine revved up the microwave I’d piss my pants and forget who I was for a half hour or so.”


2. Buddy the Elf (Elf – 2003)

Will Ferrell’s awesome, innocent, hilariously inappropriate elf was a Christmas classic. The scene where he keeps calling the midget an elf makes me laugh every time.

Favorite Quote: “I’m a cotton-headed ninny-muggins.”

3. George Bailey (It’s a Wonderful Life – 1946)

I’ve probably watched this movie once a year since I was 10-years old. It’s all  about appreciating what you have, appreciating the here and now. Great, great movie, and Jimmy Stewart as George Bailey was stellar.

Favorite Quote: “Dear Father in heaven, I’m not a praying man, but if you’re up there and you can hear me, show me the way. Show me the way.”

4. Clark Griswold (National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation – 1989)

Yep, the second choice from this movie. And who can forget Clark’s Christmas light display? But Cousin Eddie still makes the movie.

Favorite Quote: “If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be more surprised than I am now.”

5. Willie (Bad Santa – 2003)

Very dark movie. Not real Christmasy. Very inappropriate. Not politically correct at all. Certainly not for children. I loved it.


Favorite Quote: “I beat the shit out of some kids today. But it was for a purpose. It made me feel good about myself. It was like I did something constructive with my life or something, I dunno, like I accomplished something.”

So there are our Top 5 choices. Gwen over in accounting thought we should go with Gizmo from Gremlins but I thought that was just dumb. And Kody, our head of security, insisted on John McLane from Die Hard but that doesn’t seem like a Christmas Movie, just a movie that took place during Christmas. Kody is not happy.

Who are your favorites? Let’s hear ’em!