Archive for the ‘Amazing and Interesting Stories’ Category

The BBC reports that the two men, armed with machetes, aimed to carry out a client’s fantasy of “being tied up in his underwear and stroked with a broom”, except they entered the wrong house.

The role play was arranged over Facebook by a man near Griffith, New South Wales, who provided his address to the hired pair.

“He was willing to pay $5,000 if it was ‘really good’,” one of the men said.

However, the client moved to another address 30 miles away without updating the two men. They then entered a home on the street of the original address. When the resident noticed a light on in his kitchen at 6:15am, he assumed it was a friend who came by daily to make morning coffee.

When the men called out the name of their client, the resident turned on the light, and saw them standing above his bed with the machetes. At this point one of the machete-carrying men realized their mistake and one of them said, “Sorry, mate”, shook the shocked resident’s hand, and left.

In handing down a not guilty verdict, a judge stated that all evidence pointed to an honest mistake.

Oops?

Is there any reaction more Australian than after breaking into someone’s house while brandishing machetes you realize your mistake and then say, “Sorry, mate” and shake the guy’s hand? I think not. The intruders probably went back home, threw some shrimp on the barbie and had a good laugh about it.

And how about the dude who hired them? Don’t you think the correct address m-i-g-h-t be a crucial detail? Crikeys, man. Get it together client who wanted tied up in his underwear and stroked with a broom. You’re better ‘n’ at.

PS- Australia, man. First the apology and then the judge called it an honest mistake. Can’t imagine this happening anywhere else.

PPS- Except Canada.

 

The absolutely, 100% coolest thing you’ll see today.

Remember those Giant Murder Hornets I wrote about the other day? The ones that recently arrived in America? Their sting can kill you and they are able to kill honey bees by the thousands. Well, it turns out these psychos can be taken out by bees as well – Japanese Honey Bees to be exact. And how do these Japanese Honey Bees kill Murder Hornets? Read on because the answer is awesome.

Murder Hornets are best known for their ability to decimate honeybee hives, decapitating bee after bee during what the Washington State Department of Agriculture so eloquently described as a “slaughter phase”, destroying one hive within a matter of hours. However . . .

In Asia the bees have learned to fight back, and I mean really fight back, as in kicking some serious Murder Hornet ass. Japanese Honey Bees are able to form hot defensive “bee balls” in order to collectively cook hornets at a temperature that the bees can withstand but the hornets cannot. Man, that’s diabolical. They do it by surrounding the hornets and vibrating their rear flight muscles. Bee twerking if you will.

The video below shows a Murder Hornet scout approach a Honey Bee hive as a means of checking it out and marking it with a pheromone that will allow its fellow hornets to find it. But no so fast, Murder Hornet. The video shows the hornet being swarmed by hundreds of bees all at once, with thermal photography revealing the temperature increase as the honeybees raise the temperature within the bee ball to a precise temperature and roasting the hornet alive.

Nature, man. Doing her thing per usual.

PS- I don’t know how those little bees get the signal to attack, but attack they do, and all at once. Just a chilling sight to behold.

Mansa Musa became the King of Mali in 1312. This was well before European Colonization of Africa and the slave trade. Africa was free to live unimpeded at that time and the Kingdom Of Mali was rolling in resources, specifically gold and salt.

The Kingdom was doing well and the then King of Mali decided to go on a pilgrimage, so he told Musa to run the kingdom until he came back. It being the 1300s and whatnot traveling anywhere was a gamble. No cell phones to call for help, exposure to storms, marauding headhunters, dysentery, typhoid, smallpox, leprosy, no Fortnite or NBA 2K20, you get the drift. Tough world back in the day.

So, something happened and the real king never came back. Nobody ever knew for certain why, but one of those reasons above is as good a guess as any. Anywho, because of this Musa ruled Mali for the rest of his life. He built upon the empire by acquiring Timbuktu and Gao, and that allowed him to dominate trade routes all over Africa during the middle ages. This was huge because the world needed Mali’s salt, of which it had in abundance. Salt back then was a big deal because it was used to preserve food. No refridgeration in the 1300s, kids. Salt was so important, in fact, that at that time that you could trade it for it’s weight in gold, and that is exactly what Musa did. He amassed so much gold that he was worth an estimated $400-billion in today’s money. That’s more than John Rockefeller, who topped out at a measly $336-billion. Amazon founder Jeff Bezos? A paltry $120-billion. That’s chicken feed to Mansa Musi. He probably carried half that under the cool turban he sported.

The thing is, nobody really knew about Musa because he was down in Africa. It wasn’t until he took his own pilgrimage to Mecca that people learned about him internationally. That said, he wasn’t going to make the same mistakes as the King before him. Nope. My man traveled in style. He traveled across Africa to Cairo and then on to Mecca with an entourage of 60,000 people and thousands of animals, and they would throw gold at people on the streets along the way. Amazingly, they brought so much gold with them that it messed up the world’s economy for a while. Mansa Musa alone increased the amount of gold in circulation by giving so much away. Good Lord, man.

Mansa Musa died in 1337 after ruling for 25-years and had continued to give money away for his entire life. He built so many mosques across Africa that the legend is he constructed one every single Friday.

So there’s your history lesson, my loyal readers. Mansa Musa, the richest man who ever lived.

PS- Mansa Musa roughly translates to “King Of Kings” and that’s certainly fitting.

 

Note: Shoutout to Barstool Sports, where I got a lot of this information.

 

This question was asked on Twitter, and one man’s answer touched my soul. Here it is:

My wife, my 3-year daughter and I were on a vacation in Alaska. One evening we went for a walk after dinner. Upon our return we found a Grizzly Bear between us and the door to our cabin. As we came through a clearing it stood up on its hind legs and roared, showing its teeth and growling. It then made a move towards us.

Without hesitation my 11-year old Bull Terrier, Duke, charged the bear and leaped towards its throat. As that was happening I ran my daughter and wife into the cabin, grabbed my rifle and ran back outside. The bear and Duke were gone, but I could hear sounds of the battle off in the dark woods.

Finally everything became quiet and I could hear the bear crashing away through the forest. I looked for what seemed like forever for Duke, and I was assuming the worst. Finally he came limping through the underbrush to me, bleeding badly. He’d fought like a son-of-a bitch. 

I rushed him to a local vet and he licked my neck and face all the way there. He seemed to be more worried about me, and that he was glad I was ok. When I got there I found out he had a broken leg, broken jaw and a 9-inch gash on his side.

He never made it.

Would I give five years of my life to Duke?

Yes.

After all, he gave my entire family our lives.

Dogs. They’re truly a gift to mankind.

NYP – A mysterious object 500-million light years away has baffled scientists after transmitting signals that hit Earth every 16-days. Scientists do not know what is causing the phenomenon, but it is being recognized as the first reliable pattern of fast radio bursts in deep space.

Astrophysicists discovered the pattern in data from the Canadian Hydrogen Intensity Mapping Experiment, or CHIME, radio telescope in British Columbia. In this particular instance, around one to two radio bursts will blast out per hour for four days before going silent for 12-days. The cycle then repeats itself.

These newly discovered repeating bursts suggest that someone, or something, is controlling them.

And so it begins. First a minor blurb in the New York Post, then a sighting of a major asteroid that’s not really an asteroid heading our way, then we’re all laser beamed into smithereens. Seriously, I’ve read Steven Hawking. Basically he said any civilization that has the capability to cross inter-galactic space can treat humans however the hell they want. On a related note, the histories of advanced civilizations meeting primitive ones doesn’t bode well for humankind. What I’m trying to say is that it’s all over, kids. Farewell and goodnight.

PS- Wait. It’s 500-million light years away. Which means it was doing this 500-million years ago, right? I’m so confused.

 

So over the weekend I attended a local basketball game and as always The Spark accompanied me. Sparky usually goes with me unless I’m going to be out of the car a really long time or if the weather is too cold or hot. Anyone who has seen my car knows the backseat (and sometimes the front passenger side) is basically Sparky’s territory and is always filled with a doggie bed and some comfy blankets. Anyway, the game ended around 9:30pm and I set off to meet some friends at a local establishment.

However, as I drove there Spark hopped up between the seats and nudged my ear with his snout, his way of telling me he needed to use the bathroom.

Well, I was in the middle of town so I made the quick decision to pull into the new library’s parking lot. Of course the place was empty and also had plenty of grass for Spark to do his business, which he did.

Keep in mind that Sparky is generally well behaved so unless I’m in a high traffic area he’s rarely leashed. Plus he looks both ways before crossing the street, so there’s that. And yes, I’m serious.

Anyway, as we walked back to the car Sparky spotted a little Weiner Dog in somebody’s front yard, and before I could stop him he ran to the street, checked for traffic, and headed to meet a new friend. Just as I trotted over to get him, a man opened his door to let his pup back in, not even looking down as his little Weiner Dog ran back into the house. He head was actually turned back inside like he was watching the TV or something.

You know where this is going, right?

Yep, Sparky walked right into the house with his new buddy.

And just as I was about to yell something, to my horror the man shut the door behind him.

Let me tell you, although the Spark is a constant source of entertainment with his neverending antics, this was certainly a new one.

All I could do was speedwalk up to the door, give it a knock, and try to explain myself.

Guy, opening the door about 3-inches: “Can I help you?”

I swear to you the dude was oblivious. He had no idea my dog had snuck into his house.

Me: “Uh, I was walking my dog and he went into your house.”

Guy: “What? How? What do you mean?”

Me: “He saw your dog in the yard and when you opened the door to let him back in he walked right in behind him. I’m serious. He’s in there.” 

But the guy still wasn’t buying it. I’m pretty sure he suspected I was a serial killer trying to con my way into his house.

Guy: “There’s no way. I would have seen him. Also, my dog’s a she.”

Well, that certainly explained a lot. But seriously, at this point I was starting to get a little upset. I mean, the guy was being very nice, but there was zero chance I was leaving without my best friend.

Me: “Listen, I’m telling you he’s in there. His name is Sparky. I’m going to yell for him.”

Guy: “Sure, give it a try.”

Me: “SPARK! Get out here!”

Of course, the next thing you knew Sparky and his new sweetheart came strutting around the corner, happy as larks, grinning the way dogs do. The guy was incredulous and amazed that Sparky had pulled that off. Being dog people, he and his wife (no, she hadn’t noticed either) gave Spark a belly rub and a treat before we went on our way.

The Spark. He’s the only one I know who can sneak into a stranger’s house and leave with a belly rub and a milkbone.

 

 

Detroit Free Press: There is truly no place like home for the holiday’s and on Thursday, a Michigan boy finally got that forever home — sharing the moment with 36 of his closest pals!

Michael invited his entire kindergarten class to attend his adoption hearing. The class joined him Thursday morning as he celebrated joining his new family.

The court allowed family and friends to be involved in the hearing to celebrate their adoption.

Sometimes even an international blogger such as myself has to step aside simply enjoy the moment. This is one of those moments. Enjoy.

[click on the pics to enlarge]

I’m crying. You’re also crying.

Over the years I’ve told several stories that involved Jigger. Jigger was my brother-in-law and my principal, but most of all he was my friend. Whether it was going on vacations together, working together, or just hanging out, something interesting was always happening with him. If you don’t believe me, simply type “Jigger” into that search box on the left and hit enter. This site is full of Jigger stories.

For some reason this latest memory popped into my head the other day, and I’ve no idea why. It was the late 80s and Sis, Jigger, Twana and I had decided to take a camping trip through upstate New York.

Were we campers? We were not. Did we have camping gear? Nah. But hey, when Jigger got an idea in his head everyone sort of got swept up in the wave of his personality. It was that strong.

So, we went to K-Mart, bought some cheap gear and set out into the great unknown. The very first night we found a little campground somewhere south of Niagara Falls, parked our cars, set up or cheap little pup tents far away from anyone else, and built a fire. We were good to go.

Or so we thought.

It started around 10:00 that night as we were sitting around in our lawn chairs, having some adult beverages and cooking some hot dogs over the campfire. Somewhere, far in the distance, we heard a strange noise. It was sort of a faint wail, a cry of pain or distress from what sounded like an animal. We listened for a minute and dismissed it as being too far away to be a threat.

We chatted a few more minutes, then Jigger held up his hand to quiet everyone down, cocked his head, and said, “Is that thing getting closer?”

The answer was yes.

As we listened, the noise from the creature was indeed drawing closer and closer.

I guess we all stood up when the thing was maybe 100-yards out, wondering what the hell we were supposed to do. Find a weapon? Climb a tree? Run?

It turned out we didn’t have time for any of those, because before we could act it was upon us. There, bursting out of the woods, was an animal clearly possessed. It was a raccoon, and something was definitely wrong. Maybe it had rabies or something but that beast was crazed, man. It was running awkwardly, snapping its jaws and still screaming like a damn demented forest goblin.

The raccoon did a couple circles around the fire, sometimes on its hind legs, as we all darted around, high-stepping and screaming in panic, looking for somewhere to hide before the freak leaped up, ripped a vein out of one of our necks and killed us.

Then it turned, ran directly through the fire, and disappeared into the woods on the other side.

We all stood there in shock, staring at the smoke, sparks and flames the demon left in its wake as the wailing noises slowly faded into the night.

After a bit of time we started laughing, amazed at what had happened and how we’d reacted to it. And yes, we all decided it might be a good idea to sleep in the cars that night.

Those $12.99 K-Mart pup tents just didn’t seem like a good idea at the time.

PS- The next morning I woke up to the sounds of Jigger frying bacon over the campfire and singing “Rocky Raccoon” by The Beatles, because of course he was. 

Bonus raccoon gif because raccoons are cool.

A gang leader in Brazil failed in a bid to escape jail disguised as his 19-year-old daughter.

Officials released photos showing Clauvino da Silva wearing a silicone mask, a long wig, glasses, jeans, and a pink T-shirt with donuts on it after being caught out. His escape attempt was thwarted when prison guards saw him acting nervously, the Associated Press reported.

In a video also released by Rio de Janeiro’s state secretary of prison administration, da Silva takes off the disguise and some of the clothes before saying his real name. The 42-year-old, also known as Baixinho, or “Shorty,” is serving a 73-year sentence for drug trafficking.

The plan was to just to walk out through the main door and leave his daughter in his cell.

Gotta give ol’ Shorty an A for effort I guess? Dude almost pulled it off except not really. It’s hard to slip out of the slammer looking like a mannequin though. And hey, how about those parenting skills? Little guy was planning on vamoosing and leaving his daughter in his cell. That’s hardcore. Father of the Year candidate for sure. Brazilian Drug Lords, man. Always pulling some sort of shenanigans.

PS- You know he thought the t-shirt with the donuts was just the thing to put his ensemble over the top.

UPDATE: Shorty is dead. He was found in his cell, the victim of an apparent suicide.

NRK Radio- A 1-year-old explorer made an epic journey from Norway to Canada, covering 2,176-miles in 76-days. That young explorer was an Arctic fox. 

Scientists were left “speechless” by the fox’s journey, Greenland’s Sermitsiaq newspaper reports. Researchers from Norway’s Polar Institute had been tracking the young female fox on a GPS, according to BBC News. They freed her into the wild on the east cost of Spitsbergen, the main island of the Svalbard archipelago of Norway.

The fox started her journey in March, at just under a year old. She walked nearly 1,000-miles from the archipelago near the North Pole to Greenland. She completed this leg in just 21 days, then began the second part of her trek.

The fox then walked about 1,242-miles farther to Canada’s Ellesmere Island. The whole trek took her just 76-days, averaging about 28.4-miles a day. Some days, however, the ambitious fox walked over 96-miles.

No fox has been recorded traveling that far, that fast before.

Eva Fuglei, a research scientists at the Polar Institute, spoke to Norway’s NRK public broadcaster about the fox’s unlikely journey. “We couldn’t believe our eyes at first,” she said. “We were quite thunderstruck.”

This fox went much further than most others tracked before – it just shows the exceptional capacity of the little creatures. Researchers think the fox curled up in the snow to sit out the bad weather.

The fox could have traveled even farther, but scientists stopped tracking her when she reached Canada in February, because her transmitter stopped working, the Polar Institute said. 

96-miles in a day? That’s .67 miles per minute for a 20-pound animal the size of my dog Sparky. Thunderstruck indeed. And little dude did it by crossing large portions of the frozen freaking ocean, man. That’s intense. I wonder where she was going? Had to have some sort of purpose. You don’t make that journey without good reason. And it’s sad that her transmitter stopped working. We have no idea where she is now. Hell, she could be chillin’ on the beach on Prince Rupert Island for all we know. Animals, man. They never cease to amaze me.

Just kidding. He looks awful. Read on . . .

Siberia- A man allegedly found alive in a bear’s den a month after the beast attacked him and dragged him to its lair survived by drinking his own urine, according to reports in Russia. Named only as Alexander, the victim is said to have been severely injured and close to death when hunting dogs found him in Russia’s remote Tuva region. The emaciated man was reportedly rushed to hospital where medics discovered he’d broken his spine after being set upon by the brown bear.

He is said to have told doctors that the predator had overpowered him  – then tossed him in its den where it kept him for a month. According to the Siberian Times, Alexander explained: “The bear preserved me as food for later. I drank my own urine to survive.”

A group of Russian hunters found Alexander after their dogs barked and refused to move on from a bear’s den they passed in the forest, it’s reported. When the hunters checked inside the lair they apparently saw what they believed to be a “human mummy” – until they realized he was alive.

Listen, I was fully prepared to pooh-pooh Alexander’s story. After all, no website can pooh-pooh a story like Shoe: Untied, amirite? That is, until I saw that photo. That, my friends, is a man who’s been kept in a bear’s den for 30-days. No way to fake that. End of argument.

Note: The Siberian Times sounds like a great newspaper to work for, huh? Just reporting on people freezing to death, bear attacks and vodka overdoses on the daily.

Note 2: Is anyone surprised who saved Alexander? Dogs, because of course they did. Cats would have waited until the bear ate him and feasted on the scraps. 

Note 3: There are now reports this is indeed a hoax. Why does somebody always have to try and ruin a good story?

Some headlines just write themselves, ya know?

Alabama investigators are currently searching for a man who allegedly kept an “attack squirrel” inside his apartment and fed the caged animal methamphetamine in order to maintain its aggressive behavior.

Since Mickey Paulk’s Athens apartment was searched on Monday morning, the caged squirrel has been released into the wild, Limestone County Sheriff’s Office’s Public Information Officer Stephen Young confirms to PEOPLE.

According to Young, officers responded to a report on Monday at approximately 8:30 a.m. that Paulk, 35, was allegedly keeping an “attack squirrel” caged inside his home and feeding it meth.

After obtaining a search warrant, Young says animal control and narcotics officers searched the home, located in the 21000 block of Piney Chapel Road, where they seized a number of illegal items, including the squirrel, meth, drug paraphernalia, ammunition and body armor.

First of all, I’m shocked that Mickey Paulk was in possession of illegal items. Dude looks like a model citizen. Secondly, owning an attack squirrel seems like an odd choice, amirite? Seems like a mountain goat, a saltwater crocodile, or a honey badger would be better choices. Maybe a komodo dragon. Anywho, glad the little tree rat is free to roam the forest terrorizing forest creatures and whatnot. Those meth hangovers are a bitch.

PS- When I was in college at Ohio State guy I know had an attack rat. He’d turn that rodent loose and it would come straight at you. Horrifying.

Leeds- A great-grandad fulfilled one final sentimental journey when the hearse that was carrying his coffin stopped off at a Burger King restaurant so that he could buy one last Bacon Double Cheeseburger.

Seventy-one-year-old Leonard Durkin passed away as a result of heart failure on 28 May following a lengthy illness. Prior to his death, he requested to be taken to Burger King because he visited the restaurant regularly with his son Peter after his wife – Peter’s mother – died two years ago.

The Bacon Double Cheeseburger was Leonard’s order every time, and he confided to his son that once he was gone he’d like to be taken one last time.

So that is exactly what they did.

The hearse drove through the drive-thru of the Burger King on Elland Road, Leeds, and the burger was placed on top of the coffin for Leonard’s journey to his final resting place.

The jokes didn’t stop there, either. As his coffin passed through at his crematorium service, it did so to the strains of Johnny Cash’s ‘Ring of Fire’.

Man, this opens up a whole new can of worms, amirite? I’m trying to think what drive-thru I want to go through when I kick the bucket. Hopefully it’s a restaurant that hasn’t even opened yet but will in say, 2054 or thereabouts. If I’m not that lucky though I think maybe I’d like to cruise through the Mako Mike’s parking lot and have Angie run me out a Cajun Chicken & Shrimp Pasta. Hell, the smell alone just might wake me up. Seriously though, just toss a box of Cheez-Its and a jar of Cheez Whiz in my coffin and I’ll be good to go.

PS- Am I the only one that finds he died of heart failure a little ironic?

PPS- That “Ring of Fire” touch topped the whole thing off, huh? Icing on the cake.

Newshub – Dressed only in his underwear, an Australian man has heroically chased down a man who was attempting to rob his house.

Kym Ambrook was asleep in his Adelaide home on Monday, when the sound of floorboards creaking woke him up at 4am. When he went to investigate the noise, he found a home intruder. Despite being underdressed, Ambrook chased the man out of his home and yelled for his neighbours to help. ”I was out there in all me glory – I did notice I run faster naked,” he said through laughter.

Once the men had trapped the invader, Ambrook sprinted back home to grab a defense. He returned armed with a didgeridoo and a torch and held the robber until the authorities arrived. 

Nothing quite says batshit crazy like a didgeridoo and a torch, huh? That’s a fight you aren’t winning. You can come at me with an uzi, a shotgun, a machete, even a bazooka, but if you come at me with a didgeridoo and a torch I’m tucking tail and getting out of Dodge. I mean, what was Kym Ambrook going to do, beat the guy to a pulp and then set him on fire? I’m thinking that yes, he was. Best think twice before you try and rob Kym Ambrook. Australians, man.

PS- If you heard the name Kym Ambrook you’d never expect that bro, would you? Looks more like a Bubba Jackson or something.

PPS- If you don’t think I’m ordering a didgeridoo online today you’re out of your gourd.

Holy . . .

Raccoon Dogs are terrorizing a village in central England after escaping from their pen in Nottinghamshire, according to news reports.

Raccoon dogs, also called Tanukis, look like a combination of a dog and a raccoon, but are neither dog nor raccoon, however they are part of the canid family, which includes wolves and dogs.

Shortly after escaping their pen, one of the loose dogs was photographed and reportedly attacked a goat.

Police are warning residents to watch out for the animals and to stay away from them if spotted because they are “potentially dangerous if approached as they are not domesticated,” Nottinghamshire police officials said, according to CNN.

Nottinghamshire resident Mandy Marsh told the Independent that one of the escaped animals attacked her pet goat and pony.

“I heard such a terrifying noise like I had never heard before. It was screaming. We ran out and this animal – we now know it’s a raccoon dog – was trying to attack our goat, Marsh said.

“The raccoon dog was trying to kill it. It was absolutely crazy. It was hissing and screaming and snarling. It was going absolutely mad.”

Sweet Mother of God that’s a horrific looking beast. Raccoon Dog? Really? Hell, this opens up a whole new world. What’s next, Wolf Cows? Hummingbats? The mind reels. And you have to bring your A Game, goat. And any self-respecting billy would have head-butted the hell out of that Raccoon Dog. Embarrassing really.

PS- My parents had a couple miniature burrows named Pancho and Lefty that were not to be trifled with. A couple coyotes made the mistake of harassing Pancho and got kicked into oblivion.

PPS- Sparky would tear that Raccoon Dog to shreds.

 

AOL- Footage of a dutiful beluga whale returning an expensive gadget to its rightful human owner is making waves online.

Strangely enough, iPhone owner Ina Mansika and her friends were actually searching for the specific whale, known as Angel — which attained celebrity status weeks ago as a suspected Russian navy spy when it turned up in open waters around Hammerfest, Norway, wearing a harness — when the encounter occurred.

Angel hasn’t been behaving like a typical Beluga as she’s been letting people scratch her nose and chin and generally behaving like she’s having s great time.

Mansika told AOL that she and her pals laid down on a dock for a better chance to see the infamous Beluga and “hopefully get the chance to pat it” when her phone slipped out of her jacket pocket and into the ocean.

Seconds later, the considerate sea creature dove down and appeared at the surface of the water with the gadget in its mouth, to the shock of onlookers.

Check out Angel. First she defects from the damn communists and now she’s returning her fan’s cellphones, all the while with a smile on her face. If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a million times – in 100-years we’ll know stuff about the intelligence of animals that would astonish us if we knew it today. Amazing. Animals, man.

Here’s why.

May 8 (UPI) — A Chinese doctor shared video of the unusual cause of a patient’s ear discomfort — a spider building a nest inside his head.

The video filmed at a hospital in Yangzhou, Jiangsu province, shows the inside of an ear belonging to a patient identified by the surname Li.

Li came into the hospital complaining of discomfort in his ear and the doctor looked inside to discover a small spider was building a nest inside the man’s ear canal.

The doctor said the spider was too small and fast to be grabbed using tools, but hospital staff were able to use water to flush the arachnid out of the patient’s ear.

Not much to see here, just a freakin’ spider building a nest inside a man’s head. Next time you feel a little tingle in your old earhole don’t worry about it. It’s probably just a spider setting up shop in there. No biggie. Now excuse me while I go spray some Industrial Maximum Strength Raid in my ears.

PS- What the hell, man? Don’t they have Q-Tips in China?

Paris, TX- A runaway cow led Texas police on a miles-long chase through city streets and was caught on video hurdling over a pedestrian.

The Paris Police Department said the young cow made a run for it while being loaded into a sale barn and police were called to help chase the runaway animal.

A police dashboard camera recorded the cow running at a high speed through the streets, and running directly into a pedestrian. The man was knocked to the ground, and the cow jumped over him. The man wasn’t seriously injured, police said.

Police said the cow managed to give officers the slip and was on the loose for more than 24-hours before it was hit by a car and killed.

Well, that article certainly took a dark turn at the end, didn’t it? It went from being a heartwarming story of a fearless young cow escaping slaughter to lead a life on the run, roaming the fields and plowing over unsuspecting pedestrians to a story about a cow’s grisly death at the hands of a family in a 2003 Subaru Outback. That’s way too sad, man. Anyway, I know that 24-hours was worth it. Sleep well, young cow. Sleep well.

PS- Watch the video. Dude gets absolutely trucked.

Gotta respect the commitment.

Awesome.

Mirror: The Beatles Abbey Road album cover is one of the most famous in the world. The album’s sleeve shows the four members — Paul McCartney, John Lennon, George Harrison, and Ringo Starr — walking across the street outside Abbey Road Studios in North London.

However, if you look closely at the photo of the Fab Four, you’ll notice a suited gent standing on the pavement. For years fans have been trying to track the mystery man down, and it is an American tourist called Paul Cole. He was tracked down and said he was included in the snap purely by chance. Paul said he was standing by the side of the road waiting for his wife, who had been looking around a museum.

“I just happened to look up, and I saw those guys walking across the street like a line of ducks. ‘A bunch of kooks,’ I called them, because they were rather radical looking at that time.”  

He said: “I saw the album and I recognized myself right away. I had a new sports jacket on and I’d just bought new shell-rimmed glasses.
I said to my children, ‘Get a magnifying glass out and you’ll see’.”

Paul Cole died in 2008 at the age of 98.

I cannot tell you how many times I’ve looked at that cover and wondered who the dude was standing on the street in the background. I just figured it was somebody who worked in the area and was used to seeing the boys around. Turns it was Paul Cole, an American who was tired of touristing with the wifey and had gone out for a quiet moment and some fresh air. Little did he know he’d end up being on one of the most iconic rock and roll album covers in the history of mankind. That’s wild stuff, man. Anyway, Paul Freakin’ Cole. Check him out:

Man, I just read the Mars Rover Opportunity’s last message to home and I have to admit I’m a little choked up right now. I mean, we send him 33.9-million miles from home for a 90-day mission in July of 2003, he arrives on Mars in January 2004, and he outlives his expected lifespan by a freakin’ decade and a half. Then, alone on a faraway planet, a giant goddamn dust storm swoops in last June and we haven’t heard from him since.

That alone is sad enough, but then we hear what our hero’s last message was and it’s almost too much to take, man. I’ll tell you what he said, but I need a second to gather myself.

OK, I think I’m ready. Here are little Opp’s last words, sent home as the storm approached:

“My battery is low and it’s getting very, very dark . . .”

 

Well, hell. Hold on, I have something in my eye again.

PS- NASA sent their last message to Opportunity today. Nuthin’. 

PPS- There was another Rover named Spirit that went up the same time as Opportunity, and he kicked the bucket back in 2011. Just didn’t have the heart of my boy Opp.

PPPS- It would have been really cool if the last message was something like, “Wooohooo! Go straight to hell Martian dust storm! I’m gone suckers! Peace out!”

PPPPS- How great would it be if we suddenly got another message after 7-months of silence? Those nerd scientists would wet themselves.*

*Me too.