Here Are 15 Cool Palindromes For Your Perusal

Everyone knows what a palindrome is, right? Words or sentences that read the same both forwards and backwards? Like Mom or Dad? Race car? Yeah, those. Anyway, I’ve always been fascinated by them, partly because they’re cool and partly because they’re almost always funny. Why? I have no idea. My brain is weird. Anyway, here are my 15 favorite palindromes along with my completely nonsensical comments on each. Enjoy. Or not. I don’t really give a damn. It’s not my fault my interests are vast and eclectic.

Step on no pets.

I simply cannot argue with that sentiment.

Eva, can I stab bats in a cave?

Legit question, amirite?

Dammit, I’m mad!

Huh. Even palindromes have foul mouths.

Sit on a potato pan, Otis.

And why would you ask Otis to . . . never mind. I don’t want to know.

A Santa lived as a devil at NASA.

That’s a terrifying proposition.

Madam In Eden, I’m Adam.

Biblical, man.

Was it a rat I saw?

Yep. That’s a rat alright.

Do geese see God?

I’m guessing no. Just a hunch.

A man, a plan, a canal. Panama.

This one actually makes the most sense.

Go hang a salami. I’m a lasagna hog.

Both sentences bring to mind great images, right?

Never odd or even.

Then what? Wait. Is zero neither odd nor even? I’m getting a headache.

Mr. Owl ate my metal worm.

Mr. Owl is destined for digestive problems.

Doc, note: I dissent. A fast never prevents a fatness. I diet on cod.

Something about that last sentence that kills me. Love this one.

Tulsa night life: Filth, gin, a slut.

I’ve heard this is 100% accurate. Sorry, Tulsans.

A nut for a jar of tuna.

Sounds like an even trade.

Hey kids, since we’re educating you did you know a group called They Might Be Giants wrote a song about palindromes? Sure did. It contains palindromes! Here ’tis!

Ever Heard of a Contronym?

Big word guy here. I’ve written several stories about words over the years and you can find them by typing “words” into the search box over yonder if you so desire. Today we’re going to talk about contronyms.

Contronyms are single words that have opposite meanings or contradict one another. They are quite rare as you might imagine. Still, they are widely used words that you’ll recognize. Confused? Let’s go to the examples:

Bolt: to secure, or to flee

Bound: heading to a destination, or restrained from movement

Transparent: invisible, or obvious

Cleave: to adhere, or to separate

Finished: completed, or ended

Buckle: to connect, or to collapse

Trip: a journey, or a stumble

Out: visible, as with stars showing in the sky, or invisible, as in reference to lights

Dust: to add fine particles, or to remove them

Fast: quick, or stuck

Left: remained or departed

Weather: to withstand, or to wear away

Fine: excellent, or acceptable

So if you weren’t aware of contronyms I hope you learned something today. I know I did. Have a great day!

Careful With Those Quotation Marks, Kids

Quotation marks can be used when quoting someone (der), but they can also be used to show sarcasm. Here’s an example:

Everyone in the theatre could see the “surprise” ending coming halfway through the movie.

However, some folks can’t seem to comprehend that and use quotation marks incorrectly. Compare these two sentences:

Hank and his best friend Jake went to the movies together.

Hank and his “best friend” Jake went to the movies together.

See? Changes the whole meaning of the sentence, correct? Anyway, here are fifteen examples of when quotation marks have been used incorrectly, much to the amusement of all. Well, me anyway. Hope you “enjoy” them.

[click and scroll for my snarky captions]

Uh-oh Timmy.

Or perhaps not.

And what might that service be?

Act IV? Cancelled.

And by honestly they mean dishonestly.

You and your so-called “allergies.”

Well, sort of lives.

Semi-safe I guess?

If it’s not really a rock, what is it? And I don’t want to talk about the cave.

I don’t even know where to start.

Real but not really real.

Just a little tipsy.

In this case they’re actually being used correctly.

There’s a serial killer inside. Guarantee it.

Or not.