5 Myths About Liberals (And A Few About Conservatives)

You know what there is way too much of these days on both sides of the political spectrum? Folks who categorize different groups of people. As a liberal who has friends and a few family members who are conservatives I realize all is not black and white. There are many shades of gray in between. I understand that all Republicans aren’t right-wingers who support every single thing Donald Trump does. I also realize they don’t all fit the stereotype that many want to fit them into – as uptight, humorless, devoid of compassion, racist, homophobic people who hate protecting the environment. I also know that not all conservatives are tax cutting, gun collecting war lovers. To lump all conservatives into that group would be ridiculous, right? Of course it would.

Same with liberals.

With all that said, I thought I’d list a few things that I believe to me myths about the dreaded libtards liberals that Trumpanzees Trump supporters are always railing about.

Note 1: That last paragraph was me being facetious. Chillax and stop being so thin-skinned.

Note 2: Note 1 was also me being facetious.

But on to the myths. Let us begin . . .

• I’m a liberal and I’m very patriotic. I love this country and I don’t have a problem with the constitution. Yes, I see the First Amendment being threatened sometimes by conservatives, as some have talked about banning peaceful protest and marches for example. I believe in the constitutional right to worship any way you want or don’t want to worship. The Constitution doesn’t support a national religion, as some, and I say some, conservatives would like. I also happen to believe in the Second Amendment and I support gun reform to reduce death caused by certain guns. I do not support the confiscation of all guns, and by the way neither did President Obama. I also support an individual’s right to sit or kneel during the National Anthem, and it has nothing to do with my support of our armed forces, who incidentally fight for the very right to be able to do what I’m talking about.
• I’m a liberal and I don’t want to kill unborn children. I simply believe in pro-abortion rights, which means supporting a woman’s right to make a choice to have an abortion based on health or extremely extenuating reasons, such as rape, and not just because she doesn’t want a child. Again, all cases are not black and white. To me it’s a personal choice to be made by a woman.
• I’m a liberal and I’m not thin-skinned nor easily offended. I’m a liberal yet I hate the “Wussification of America” (if you don’t believe me type those words into the search box up there). I think people have gone way overboard with getting their feelings hurt, to the point of absurdity. I believe people should suck it up and not let mere words bother them so much.
• I’m a liberal and I don’t want to dole out welfare checks to able-bodied men or women who will not work. I’m also in favor of prosecuting welfare fraud. That said, as a liberal I believe in helping and assisting people with education, training and finding jobs that will help them maintain their dignity. The majority of food stamp recipients aren’t the lazy stereotype but are children, the elderly, the disabled and the working poor. Simple as that. Despite what you might think people on welfare aren’t lying back in a hammock enjoying a wine spritzer. I believe that most people are good and need the assistance and that those who are abusing the system should be prosecuted. And oh, by the way, anyone who hates government, taxes and socialism but receives free, taxpayer-subsidized Medicare or Medicaid is just begging to be called a hypocrite. Especially those that complain the free healthcare isn’t good enough.
• I’m a liberal, and although I don’t attend church regularly I do believe strongly in following in the examples set forth in the Bible- by helping people if it’s in my power and not turning away anyone in need if I can possibly help it. Yes, liberals can be religious. I also believe there are examples set forth in religions such as Buddhism, Hinduism, Judaism, Islam and others that we can all follow.

Not all conservatives are the enemy and it’s the same with liberals. And again, the political spectrum is a wide and diverse one.

So let’s stop with all the generalizing, labeling and stereotyping. I’ll try if you will. After all, ultimately we’re all on the same side here, right?

PS- And for the love of God everyone should fact-check before going on a rant about something, myself included. There’s way too much misinformation being put out from both sides. Yes, both sides. You know who broke the story regarding Hillary’s emails, right? The New York Times.

More Proof That God Has A Sense Of Humor

COLLIER COUNTY, Fla. (WTXL) – A Florida woman has been arrested after robbing a postal worker with a plastic toy gun and fleeing on a tricycle.

Leida Crisostomo, 52, of Naples, was arrested on Saturday by the Collier County Sheriff’s Office.

According to the Naples Daily News, while being handcuffed, Crisostomo yelled “God was telling me to do things.”

Now, some may say this woman is batshit crazy, but you know what? I totally believe her. Why, you ask? Because I firmly believe God messes with us sometimes. Yep, it was probably a slow Saturday in the afterworld and God was bored. So, he just randomly picked out Leida Crisostomo down in Naples and told her to go rob a postal worker with a plastic toy gun and flee on a tricycle. Then he sat back and enjoyed the festivities. God, man. Always up to something.

PS- You know, if you really think about it my theory explains a lot.

PPS- What self-respecting postal worker allows themselves to be robbed by a woman on a tricycle with a toy gun? Sad really. 

PPPS- Some phrases are just inherently funny, and “flee on a tricycle” is one of them.

 

Man Killed Trying to Bring Christianity to Remote Island Tribe

New Delhi: American John Chau was intent on bringing Christianity to the Sentinelese, a remote tribe living on an island off the coast of India. His initial contacts with the tribe, hunter-gatherers who reject contact with the outside world, had not gone well. One teenager shot an arrow at him, piercing his waterproof bible. Yet Chau decided to return to the island and try again, galvanized by the feeling he was God’s instrument.

“Lord, is this island Satan’s last stronghold where none have had the chance to hear your name?” he wrote in his diary.

Chau knew his mission was illegal. He wrote of his intention and plan to local avoid authorities. “God himself is watching and hiding us from the Coast Guard and many patrols” he wrote. Critics say his brazen violation of Indian law was selfish and put the fragile tribe at risk, exposing them to modern diseases for which they have no immunity.

The morning after Chau’s final trip to the island’s shores, fisherman who had taken him there saw his body being dragged and buried in the sand. He was likely killed by the Sentinelese usual method of weaponry – bows and arrows.

Listen, I don’t have a whole lot of sympathy for folks who put themselves in situations like this – the guy who was arrested in North Korea, the couple who were hiking in Pakistan and wandered into Iran and were arrested – I mean, if you’re crazy enough to go into Third World Countries for your own selfish reasons you get what’s coming to you. However, this John Chau takes the cake. I mean, spreading the gospel is great and all, but doing it whilst breaking the law and at the risk of exposing a whole island of people to diseases from which they have no immunity doesn’t sound real Christiany, know what I’m sayin’?

PS- I’m not 100% certain how God felt about this guy after all. I mean, was “God’s Instrument” John Chau or the Sentinelese arrows?

PPS- Seems like an arrow through your waterproof bible might have been a warning signal, but maybe that’s just me. 

Sonseed’s “Jesus is My Friend” is Pure Electric!

Listen, I rarely use exclamation points at the end of my titles but if any video deserves it it’s this one. I swear to God this may be the single greatest Christian band in the annals of Christian bands. I feel like going to church right now, not even kidding. And that lead singer is straight fire. This band has it all – the moves, the hot keyboardist, mind-blowing backup vocals, just pure electric on all levels. These cats have a straight line to Jesus, no doubt about it. Breathtaking really. Now excuse me while I go download Sonseed’s entire catalog.

Funny Photo of the Day!

Ever see something that makes you laugh and you don’t really know why? I swear I took one look at this photo and laughed out loud. There’s something about it that just cracks me up. The Pope is sort of turned away, looking miserable or maybe a little perplexed, and The Donald just grinning like a kid who just told on his little brother or conned the American people or something. It’s wild, man. Anywho, maybe it’s just me but I thought I’d share.

PS- Looks like the making of a great reality show, amirite? Watch The Pope & The Donald, just a wacky show about a couple bros and their crazy shenanigans. Wednesdays at 9:00 pm on A&E.

Map of the Day: The Spread of Religion in the World

Very cool.

Map of the Day: Atheists in the World

Interesting.

Two Televangelists Explain Why They Need Private Jets

God, I love this. Jesus had to travel at night because he didn’t have shoes and the sand was too hot, but these two multimillionaire preachers* are justifying their private jets by saying the Lord told them they need one. That’s classic TV preacher right there.

*I looked it up. The guy on the left, Kenneth Copeland, has a net worth of $760-million. Jesse Duplantis, the guy on the right, is a little more secretive regarding his wealth but a photo of his house is below. 

Here’s a photo of Copeland’s house.

And here’s the house of DuPlantis, under construction.

So anyway, congrats to all the folks who donate to these men. After all, I’m sure it’s important to them that they have this lifestyle. You know, because God told them to have it. Hallelujah!

Map of the Day: States With 25% of Their Population Unaffiliated With a Religion

Hmmm. The West and New England mostly. And what’s up with Wisconsin and Indiana?

Map of the Day: The Second Largest Religious Tradition in Each State

I see you, Arizona.

Map of the Day: Percentage of Christians per Country

Informative, at least to me.

Image of Jesus appears in landslide, because of course it does.

Looks more like Roger Daltrey to me.

Daily Mirror – After a small landslide in the San Francisco area of Putumayo in Colombia a likeness of Jesus has appeared in the landslide scar.  The newspaper reports that the apparition is attracting hundreds of visitors – enough to need the presence of the police to control the crowds.

There he goes again, just popping up right and left everywhere you go. Heck*, I remember a couple years ago when somebody saw Jesus on a dog’s butt.

*I don’t know, “hell” just didn’t seem appropriate today.

I searched up “Face of Jesus” on The Goggle and found that HE has appeared on an Ikea Door, a roast, mold, various walls, drainpipes, a Chinese takeout box, bread, a cider bottle, a bruise, a ham sandwich, a chicken, and yes, on a sock. Not even kidding. Check ’em out:

You know, I’ve never understood the insanity surrounding this “Face of Jesus” phenomenon. People just go nuts flocking to see them, falling to their knees and praying, just losing their gourds. But what’s the big deal, really? I’m sure I could find the face of Elmer Fudd everywhere if I looked hard enough. And why would Jesus make his face appear on a potato chip in the first place? What’s the point?

Then again, maybe Jesus just has a great sense of humor. Perhaps he’s up there just messin’ with us. I can see it now . . .

“Hey angels, watch this. I’m gonna put my image on this Cheeto and see if Harvey Weinbaum notices. Wait . . . wait . . . dang it! He ate it. Didn’t even look. Shoot. Let’s try it on Georgette Hugglesworth down in Mississippi. I’ll put my face on some grits. Here we go. What the heck? She chugged it down like a slurpee at the state fair. Holy cow.” 

And so on . . .

Seriously, if I was Jesus I’d appear during the Super Bowl. I’d be 20-feet tall and just pop right up on the 50-yard line. I’d do a moonwalk and the splits right in front of the world like a boss. Then I’d twirl, take a bow, zoom back up to heaven and watch everybody run to church and pray for their sorry souls. But have my face appear on a banana peel? Not so much.

Note: I once saw an image of Kate Beckinsale on my shower curtain but that’s neither here nor there.

Kid dominates dance floor at his Bar Mitzvah.

Listen, I don’t claim to really understand the whole Bar Mitzvah thing. Hell, I’m a simple Midwestern kid who didn’t know Jews from Buddhists growing up. Apparently though, it’s a Jewish Rite of Passage where a kid becomes accountable and stuff. What I do know is three things about Shawn Sperling:

1. Shawn Sperling just owned the dance floor like a boss.

2. Shawn Sperling loves him some Madonna.

3. Shawn Sperling has swag for days.

I ain’t mad at ya, Shawn Sperling. Express yourself young man. Express yourself.

Tales from the Classroom, Part XV: Cody Questions the Resurrection

So we’re talking about the Aztecs and their religious practices in class today. The topic of who and how they worshipped came up, and I was comparing it to Christianity and other religions. At one point I mentioned that in any religion there’s an element of faith involved and mentioned Jesus rising from the dead. That’s when Cody’s arm went up:

Me, warily, because I know Cody: “Yes, Cody?”

Cody: “Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a problem with Christianity or anything, but if Jesus rose from the dead and walked out of that cave wouldn’t he, you know, be a zombie?”

Sometimes it’s best to just move on to the next question.

Which of course I couldn’t.

I considered it for a second, then we went on to have a 20-minute discussion on the Aztecs, Christianity, human sacrifice, Islam, zombies, Judaism, and the upcoming season opener of The Walking Dead.

Politically correct? Ummm, maybe not.

But you know, sometimes you gotta embrace those teaching moments.