Archive for the ‘Food’ Category

These little balls of tasty goodness are also known as Poutine Poppers, and they apparently originated up in America’s Hat, sometimes known as Canada. They are basically cheese curd encrusted fries and I am dying right now. Anywho, Poutine Poppers also known as Cheese Stuffed Potato Bites!

Courier Mail – Drivers are more careful driving with a cake than their own children, new research shows.

The data obtained by News Corp from YouGov Galaxy and NRMA Insurance involving more than 1000 people found 77% of men and 68% of women to have a high opinion of their driving skills. In addition, 50% of parents said they drive more carefully with children, and only 12% said they drive with caution when transporting something fragile like a cake in the car.

However, when put to the test in an 8-day experiment involving 20-parents, the study found 95% of the drivers improved their skills and driving when transporting a cake in comparison to driving a child or being alone in the car.

People are outraged about this but I can’t lie here. The results of this study surprise me in no way whatsoever. I mean, your kid is strapped in, amirite? Even if you have a fender bender little Bub will be just fine. But a cake? A cake is a whole other story. First off, a cake is usually for a special occasion, specially made, blah-blah-blah. You can’t just run back and get another one should it slide off the seat or flip over or something. Come on man. No brainer. People who drive recklessly with a cake in the car are out of their gourds.

PS- Plus, cakes are delicious.

First off, let’s get this out of the way – I don’t like Pumpkin Pie. Never will, and you can’t make me. For this I am resolute and unapologetic. Also, and this may be shocking to many, I’m not crazy about turkey. That said, there are many a Thanksgiving dish I do savor, hence my 2019 Thanksgiving Dinner Power Rankings. Remember kids, before you get all up in arms and whatnot these are simply my personal preferences, so chillax. I also realize some of these are actually sides and not traditional Thanksgiving fare but it’s my website so I can do what I want. Let’s start at the bottom and work our way up . . .

10. Honey Glazed Ham

Big ham guy here, but it has to be honey glazed. Nothing like a good glazin’ of honey, amirite? Scrumptious.

9. Garlic Butter Cheesy Crescent Rolls

Yep. And butter those suckers up like a boss. Can’t have too much butter, heart attacks be damned.

8. Baklava

Can a Greek dish like Baklava be considered a Thanksgiving dish? Damn straight it can, because it’s delicious. Love that flaky phyllo pastry, man.

7. Oyster Stuffing

I know, I know. I don’t like turkey but I like stuffing. I’m a complex individual. Deal with it. PS- Must use Old Bay in the recipe. I learned this from someone who can actually cook.

6. Garlic Parmesan Mashed Potatoes

Love. It. Something about that garlic and parmesan mix that I love. On a related note, I can’t handle chunky mashed potatoes. Blech.

5. Deviled Eggs

My sister Sara makes some killer deviled eggs that are unsurpassed. A holiday staple.

4. Sausage Rolls with Worcestershire Sauce

So damn good. Heaven with a touch of tangy crispiness.

3. Garlic Parmesan Stuffed Mushrooms

Aw man. Add some cream cheese, black pepper and some other stuff and go to town on those bad boys. T-a-s-t-y.

2. Bacon Wrapped Spicy Meatballs

Let’s see . . . spicy? Check. Meatballs? Check. Bacon? Hell yes. Gimme those small ones that you pick up with a toothpick and I may down 20 in a single sitting.

And #1 is  . . . Sharp Cheddar Macaroni & Cheese 

Because of course it is. To not like Mac ‘n’ Cheese is downright un-American, man. I’m a bit of a cheese snob, and I’ll take freshly grated cheese over packaged grated cheese all day, every way. Anywho, you simply can’t go wrong with this cheesy bowl of goodness.

Aaaand I’ve made myself hungry again. Catch y’all later.

Can’t argue with Ohio. Love me some stuffed mushrooms, man. This is according to Google.

 

Click here for the recipe. Thank you and goodnight.

PS- You’re welcome.

Thank you and goodnight.
Ingredients
  • 2 cups powdered sugar
  • 1 1/3 cups creamy peanut butter
  • 1/4 cup butter, melted
  • 2/3 cup graham crackers crumbs
  • 1 tbsp maple syrup
  • 1 tsp salt
  • cups white chocolate, melted
  • 2 tsp coconut oil
  • sprinkles for garnish
Instructions
  1. Line a medium baking sheet with parchment paper. In a large bowl, combine powdered sugar, peanut butter, butter, graham cracker crumbs, maple syrup and salt. Using a whisk or hand mixer, mix ingredients until smooth and fully incorporated.

  2. Using a small cookie scoop, form mixture into balls and place on prepared baking sheet.

  3. In a medium bowl, combine melted white chocolate and coconut oil and stir until smooth. Dip peanut butter balls in white chocolate and place on cooling rack (excess chocolate will drop off).

  4. Top with sprinkles, then refrigerate until set, about 10 minutes.

A man by the name of Cody Bondarchuk has posted the following on the Twitter machine:

From Cody Bondarchuk’s Twitter account:

Cody Bondarchuk
@codybondarchuk
“I worked at McDonald’s for two and a half years and I put 11 nuggets in almost every 10-piece I ever made.”

7:27 PM · Nov 15, 2019Twitter for iPhone

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new American hero and his name is Cody Bondarchuk. 11-McNuggets per order over a  2 1/2 year period adds up to about $1,600 worth of McNuggets that this Man-God has bestowed upon humanity. I can think of few other humans who have given back to the community like Cody Bondarchuk has. God bless you my man. God bless you.

That’s cool, man.

Ladies and gentlemen, sometimes something comes along that is so great, so awesome, so awe-inspiring that words do not do it justice. This is one of those times. Without further ado, I give you an Oreo cookie that is not double-stuffed but triple-stuffed. Thank you and goodnight.

SOURCE – Pizza Hut finally found a new place to hide cheese… inside of a giant Cheez-It.

The pizza chain just announced the addition of a brand new item to their menu, called the Stuffed Cheez-It Pizza. It’s pretty much exactly what it sounds like.

The Stuffed Cheez-It Pizza was created after Pizza Hut realized that their largest fan base — college students — was also fond of Cheez-Its, according to a press release.

Now available nationwide, the new “pizza” looks like a giant Cheez-It, albeit stuffed with mozzarella cheese (pepperoni is also available). A single order comes with four large squares containing the mozzarella inside a cheese-baked crust. It also comes packed with a side of marinara sauce for dipping.

Sweet God Almighty. I promise you that there is no ocean I wouldn’t swim across, no mountain I wouldn’t climb, no fire I wouldn’t walk through to try the new Stuffed Cheez-It Pizza. Then again, there are a couple Huts within 12-miles of me so that’s not really necessary I guess. Anyway, how in the hell did it take someone this long to come up with this idea? I mean really? Pizza? Cheez-Its? ‘Tis a match made in heaven, man.

PS- In my exhaustive research I came across a recipe for Cheez-It Crusted Chicken Fingers and now I can’t stop thinking about it.

I love these guys. “Do I look like a cold cheeser to you?”

Leeds- A great-grandad fulfilled one final sentimental journey when the hearse that was carrying his coffin stopped off at a Burger King restaurant so that he could buy one last Bacon Double Cheeseburger.

Seventy-one-year-old Leonard Durkin passed away as a result of heart failure on 28 May following a lengthy illness. Prior to his death, he requested to be taken to Burger King because he visited the restaurant regularly with his son Peter after his wife – Peter’s mother – died two years ago.

The Bacon Double Cheeseburger was Leonard’s order every time, and he confided to his son that once he was gone he’d like to be taken one last time.

So that is exactly what they did.

The hearse drove through the drive-thru of the Burger King on Elland Road, Leeds, and the burger was placed on top of the coffin for Leonard’s journey to his final resting place.

The jokes didn’t stop there, either. As his coffin passed through at his crematorium service, it did so to the strains of Johnny Cash’s ‘Ring of Fire’.

Man, this opens up a whole new can of worms, amirite? I’m trying to think what drive-thru I want to go through when I kick the bucket. Hopefully it’s a restaurant that hasn’t even opened yet but will in say, 2054 or thereabouts. If I’m not that lucky though I think maybe I’d like to cruise through the Mako Mike’s parking lot and have Angie run me out a Cajun Chicken & Shrimp Pasta. Hell, the smell alone just might wake me up. Seriously though, just toss a box of Cheez-Its and a jar of Cheez Whiz in my coffin and I’ll be good to go.

PS- Am I the only one that finds he died of heart failure a little ironic?

PPS- That “Ring of Fire” touch topped the whole thing off, huh? Icing on the cake.

Discuss.

Ingenious.

The Takeout: In the admittedly narrow world of Cheetos-fast food mashups, Burger King’s Mac-And-Cheetos and Taco Bell’s Cheetos Quesadillas have some new competition. KFC announced it is testing a new Cheetos Sandwich in selected restaurants at locations in North Carolina, Virginia, and Georgia. KFC lovingly describes in a press release: “Made by coating a juicy, hand-breaded Extra Crispy chicken filet with special Cheetos sauce and placing it on a toasted bun with mayo and a layer of crunchy Cheetos, the Cheetos Sandwich will give you a blast of craveable Cheetos in every bite.” In this manner, KFC doubles up on the Cheetos-ness, providing a Cheetos sauce as well as actual Cheetos in the sandwich.

Listen, I’m not a big KFC guy but HOLY MOTHER OF GOD. Juicy? Check. Extra crispy? Check. Toasted bun? Check. Cheetos sauce? Check. CHEETOS? Check. I’m in. Who’s up for a Road Trip to Virginia?

From a couple years ago but still . . .

Lord God almighty that looks tasty. Yes, please.

Note: Here’s the recipe if you’re interested.

What can I say, some headlines just write themselves . . .

BYRON, Ill. — Ten football players at a Northern Illinois high school were suspended from the team for three games last month after they ran across the field naked with Oreo cookies wedged between their buttocks. The Rockford Register Star reports that the Byron High School players were suspended for indecent exposure after school administrators concluded they went on the “Oreo Run” at the school’s football field voluntarily and were not victims of hazing.

Well, isn’t this a crummy story. Listen, I couldn’t care less that a bunch of football players were involved in some homo-erotic team tradition. Hey, to each his own. What does bother me is that perfectly innocent Oreos were involved. Delicious Oreos are made to be eaten, not double-stuffed into a tight end. That’s abuse of a delicious snack treat, my friends.

PS- I heard one of the guys lost the filling in his ass. That’s unfortunate.

PPS- That “double stuffed into a tight end” line is what separates me from your ordinary bloggers, kids.

WHAT THE HELL WISCONSIN?!?

Listen, I love pizza. I also love candy corn. But do I love the idea of candy corn pizza? Hell no I don’t. Hey, I also love peanut butter and shrimp but I’ll be damned if I want them combined. That’s just wrong. man. Whoever invented this pizza is evil, has no soul and has the heart of a demon. Disgusting.

This is beer, battered and fried. The beer is poured into little ravioli pockets which burst with scalding suds upon first bite. To make it, the beer is placed inside a pocket of salty, pretzel-like dough and then dunked in oil at 375 degrees for about 20 seconds, a short enough time for the confection to remain alcoholic. When you take a bite the hot beer mixes with the dough to create a delicious taste sensation. And yes, kids, you have to be 21 to eat it. Deep Fried Beer, an idea whose time has come.

Eat pizza like it’s your job? Now it can be.

Portable pizza oven company Ooni is looking to hire 10 pizza taste-testers who will get paid anywhere from $300 to $1,000 a day. For the job, you will have to make your own pizzas, whether experimenting on your own pizza recipes or following the company’s recipes and tweaking them, and the company will pay for all ingredients.

The most important quality is having enthusiasm for cooking and a love of pizza.

Once hired, pay will be determined based on how much time can be invested. Applicants can choose how many hours to work a day, which should be mentioned in the application.

Ooni is interested in “novices to professional pizzaioli,” Darina Garland, co-founder of Ooni, tells CNBC Make It.

Hold on, let me work on my letter of application. Ok, got it:

Dear Ooni,

First off, your name sounds like it might belong to a beautiful, exotic lady, rather than a portable pizza over company. Love it. Secondly, I fit your requirements perfectly. I’m not a professional pizzaioli but I do love pizza. All kinds of pizza. I’ll eat anything as long as it’s on a pizza. Well, maybe not pineapple because that’s gross. Also anchovies. Don’t care for those. Oh, and spinach. Eww. I also had a pizza with lettuce on it once that was just horrific. But other than those I’m all in. As for cooking, I’m learning to handle my new crock pot like a boss and nobody mans a toaster oven like this guy. As for having the time, hell, I’m wide open.

Let’s do this Ooni. I’m your guy.

Sincerely,

Shoe

PS- I once invented a sandwich consisting of toasted bread, Cheese-Whiz and Cheez-Its. It was christened the Sweet Cheezuz. Google it.

PPS- In retrospect perhaps I should’ve addressed my letter to Darina Garland. Oh well.

 

 

 

According to studies, 84% of vegetarians eventually go back to eating meat.

30% of Americans don’t drink alcohol. 60% have less than one drink per week. The top 10% have 74 drinks a week.