BREAKING: Woman and Ghost Pirate Are Splitsville

Posted: December 10, 2018 in Death, Humor, Relationships, The Supernatural, WTF?
Tags:

Source – A woman who married the ghost of a 300-year-old pirate claims the couple have split up. Amanda Teague married the Haitian pirate named Jack earlier this year. The wedding to her ‘soulmate’ took place on board a boat in international waters off the Irish coast. However the Irish Mirror reports the couple have called it a day after less than a year. Amanda said: “So I feel it’s time to let everyone know that my marriage is over. “I will explain all in due course but for now all I want to say is be very careful when dabbling in spirituality, it’s not something to mess with.” The split is another blow for Jack, as he was purportedly executed for thieving on the high seas in the 1700s. 

Well I’ll be damned. This one is a shocker, man. If anyone was going to make it I’d have bet the ranch on these two lovebirds. Seemed like a match made in heaven. Or hell, depending on where Jack lives. Seriously though, I was really holding out hope for these two wacky kids. I thought they really had a shot. So damn sad. A loss for all of us really. A loss for love.

PS- Then again, I know it’s pretty common knowledge that the marriage success rate between batshit crazy female lunatics and 16th century poltergeist pirate swashbucklers isn’t good. ‘Twas an uphill battle from the start.

PPS- I tried for 30-minutes to come up with an “Arrrrrr!” or “Ahoy Matey!” joke to put in there but I came up blank. I did have a Poop Deck knee-slapper but couldn’t pull the trigger.

Gimme a holler.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s