Bible Study Group Suspended For Temptation By Donut

Posted: January 13, 2017 in Food, Humor, News, Opinion
Tags:
Sweet Mother of Congestive Heart Failure

Sweet Mother of Congestive Heart Failure

The Joplin, MO school district has reportedly agreed to the demands of legal group and suspended a bible study after complaints that free donuts were being used to induce children to attend the meetings. The American Humanist Association’s legal team drafted a nine-page letter to the school district last month that made several allegations, including that the school was “enticing students to Bible studies with donuts” and such conduct “is deceitful and inappropriate during school hours.” The letter further stated, “Teachers should treat all of their students equally rather than giving out special treats to students who participate in Christian activities.”

Listen, I couldn’t agree more here, but for reasons just a little different than those given by The American Humanist Association. Here’s my take – why would you want to entice kids with donuts? Wouldn’t they be attending for the wrong reasons, like being hungry or because, you know, donuts is good?* Hell, I’d go to a Satanic Temple meeting if they were giving out free grilled-cheese sandwiches. Doesn’t mean I have to sell my soul to Lucifer or anything. Then again, maybe they just wanted to lure the kids in with the promise of tasty goodness, then spring the Word of God on them like the ultimate boss. Wait. I think I just proved their point for them. Disregard.

*

I actually took this photo in the bathroom of a little mountain bar outside Morgantown, WV. True story.

I actually took this photo in the bathroom of a little mountain bar outside Morgantown, WV. True story.

Note: I never know how to spell donut. Should it be doughnut? I’m also confused on the whole cream and creme thing. I’m getting a migraine.

Note II: Cue the know-it-alls who will look it up on Google and then tell me sanctimoniously which is which.

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